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!!!!!!>                                                                <!!!!!!
!!!!!!>>                      Golf Cart Fun                           <<!!!!!!
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!!!!!!>>>>                 By: The Shadow Lord                      <<<<!!!!!!
!!!!!!>>>>>              Thanx to: The Metallian                   <<<<<!!!!!!
!!!!!!>>>>>>                                                      <<<<<<!!!!!!
!!!!!!>>>>>>>       A Metal Communications Presentation          <<<<<<<!!!!!!
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>>>>>>    Call: /\/\etalland 1  10megs/AE/BBS/Cat-Fur [503]538-0761     <<<<<<
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  Ever walk passed a golf course and see those little cars and think "Gee I
want one of those" ? Well, now with the miracle of hotwiring, you can. 

  Checklist:

Gloves
Boltcutters (optional)
Wirecutters W/ Strirper
Set of screwdrivers (also optional)
Backpack for Items
Flashlight (dim)

 Finding Golfcarts:

  Walk around the rich nieghboorhoods on the golfcourse and you will notice an abundance of golfcarts in people's driveways, carports, etc. Look for one without the bucket seats, as they are hard to hotwire. Also I recommend gas
power because charging is a pain in the ass, especially when you don't want
to keep it at home. Avoid those 3 wheeled piece of shits! they are practicaly
worthless as the tip over when you go for 'stunts'. I drove one off a cliff
on accident and it rolled over Romeo Delta's foot, now it is fractured.

 Making way with it:

   Well, you obviously don't want to hotwire it in thier front yard so put
it into neutral and release the brake. If it is electric it will be plugged
in, take the charger! you'll need it later. If it is chained, use the boltcutters, then have one person push and the other steer it out of the
driveway, and into some dark alley or the golfcourse trees, make sure the push
is downhill! 

  Hotwireing:

   These are soo much easier than cars to wire because 1) the stearing wheel
doesn't lock, 2) only 2 wires on the ignition, and 3) easy ignition access.
If you got the one with the key next to the steering wheel, forget it, they
are the hardest to hotwire. But, if you got one with a bench seat, Bingo, you're in luck. lift the seat (it will lift from the back to the front, likea door). Ok, you will see 10 rechargable car batteries or a gas motor. Then to
the front you will see the electic parts. Find out where ignition is, cut them,
strip them, and merge them together so they stay. Some electricians tape is
nice to hold them together untill you buy a switch.

 What to do with them:

  Well, the funnest thing by far is go to the sprinklers where the grass
is really wet on a hill, go down(full speed and slam the brakes, turn, and you
have 180! (note: Do NOT attempt this with a 3 wheeler!) Another thing to do
is to take it to the beach, or get two (if you go with a friend) and play
derby, joust, chicken, or whatever. Or take it for a drive around the nieghboorhood. Just avoid fucking around on a mountain road, as i mentioned before, I are it and attracted the attention of the fire department and cops,
which we barely avoided with Romeo Delta limping. Also, never attempt a 180
on concreate! I busted the axle off and had to steal another one.

   Have fun and don't get busted,

            Shadow Lord

 Golf Cart Fun (C) 1985 from the Noctuornal Activities Collection.
P.S. I like keeping the ingnition switch as a little souveneer or sending it
to the owner in the mail with a little note like "Have a nice day" or
demanding a ransom.