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ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #880
`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8
888 888 888 888 888 "Maining Trip"
888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8
888 888 888 888 888 " by Oregano
888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 10/16/99
o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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Though I was mainlining it, the triptophan was slow to kick in. I
needed to get tired quickly and the triptophan was all I could do in a
hurry. Triptophan is the stuff in turkey that makes you all loggy after a
Thanksgiving meal, it also comes in little bottles that you can easily steal
from a college chemistry locker if you tell the professor that you took off
your watch to do an experiment and need to get it back and you'll only be a
moment in the classroom if he can unlock the door.
[15 minutes later]
I realise now that I made a serious mistake in mainlining the
triptophan; it makes you tired and sleepy but it does not put you to sleep,
at least in the quantity I took -- quite a bit more than you get after even
the biggest turkey meal -- instead it makes the heart beat really hard and
keeps you quite awake but really tired. I feel like a trucker who has been
up for 36 hours yet has drunk four cups of caffeine. I need to mix in
something else to take off the rush and let the tripto take me off to sleep.
[45 minutes later]
My hands have swollen up and I am no longer sure how to breathe.
Actifed seemed like a good thing to add to the mix, mellow me out a little,
but I had forgotten that the sleep it induces is quite light and without
dreams. Mixed with the triptophan my brain barely functions.
[an hour later]
Skiers.
You know those extreme skiers on ESPN-2? They ski down a mountain
that is too steep to even climb, and these skiers do not so much ski as they
fall, the skis sometimes touch the snow and sometimes only air, but somehow
they keep out-of-control together enough that they don't get overtaken by
the avalanch, and they don't spin out and flip like a rag doll and they make
it down the mountain. Right now that is my brain. The thoughts sometimes
kick in and I can process them and other times fly off free from my grasp
and I fight to keep it all barely under control.
One thing about triptophan is that not only does it take forever to
kick in -- even mainlined -- but it takes forever to wear off.
[next day]
I am not sure what exactly happened last night but I lost part of
myself. I don't know what that something is but something vital that is
normally part of my mind, some lost piece and now I need to go looking for
it.
I have a bottle of pure DM cough syrup and I am going to use it to go
back into my mind and find that missing part.
[three days later]
Freebasing St John's Wort has no effects you can categorize as
positive.
A little St John's Wort looks smokeable when you open up the capsules
and see the ground up leaves -- or whatever it is -- but does not burn well
without the ether used in freebasing.
The herbal guide says that St John's Wort gives you a sense of
well-being if you take it every day for over a month. I can testify that an
effort to jump start the process through freebasing gives you a horribly dry
mouth and makes your fingers ache and crackle when you try to make a fist.
But you will never be able to make a fist, you are too weak and in too much
pain. Any movement of fingers or feet is like you are breaking a bone. Lie
still and pray for it to pass.
Time, after you have freebased St. John's Wort, is weird in that it
does not slow down or speed up but when you have a thought, it zooms through
your mind at a hundred miles an hour. If you just sit back and clear all
thoughts then there is no time. You feel each moment as part of a bigger
moment as part of a bigger sort of now with no future or past. At least
until a thought comes, which feels like a subway train through your living
room.
I could not hold a pen to write the above while it was happening, but
the images of freebased St. John's Wort were all clear enough this morning.
The effects wore off in four hours.
[a few days later]
Okay, it has been a few days of me taking only conventional drugs and
now I have just eaten a handful of nighshade berries. I know that they are
posisonous, but the herbal guide said that in small amounts they are not
fatal, and though it said to avoid, I read between the lines and saw a nice
trip in the sub-lethal levels.
To insure a good buzz I also sprayed Windex on a rag and I inhale
every few minutes, but still I have no major effects. The nightshade must
take a long while to kick in. You'd think a poison would work faster.
[15 minutes later]
I think it is the Windex which is making me feel this way. I keep
thinking of all the times in my life I have cried. Not just times I was
sad, but really let it out and cried. I can reach out with my current self
and touch each of my past selves. My arm is really long, and stretches back
years, and when I touch one of my crying selves, a number pops up over my
head. They are not normal numbers, but I still know how to read them and
now the nightshade must be kicking in too, I feel really sick.
[later]
I threw up and the floor is all spongy. I can see that everything is
made of sponge material. Walking is hard on a giant sponge but it helps
that my shoes are made of sponge too.
[the following week]
I spent a little time in the hospital and I seem to have a little
liver damage from the nightshade. The doctor says that if I stay off the
drugs I can still lead a fairly normal and healthy life.
But I don't see how a mixture of flour with shavings of Ivory soap
could be considered in any way to be a drug, so I light up and am off on
another trip. Bon voyage.
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #880 - WRITTEN BY: OREGANO - 10/16/99 ]