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   ooooo   ooooo  .oooooo.  oooooooooooo       HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #761
   `888'   `888' d8P'  `Y8b `888'     `8
    888     888 888      888 888                     "The Box!"
    888ooooo888 888      888 888oooo8
    888     888 888      888 888    "                 by Devon
    888     888 `88b    d88' 888       o              7/28/99
   o888o   o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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        A cardboard box u say?  why yes I do say, and what a lovely box it
 is!  a box is a better way to go don't ya know eh!  Well whats the point of
 the almighty box, you're probably wondering.  well losers wouldn't use a
 couch cuz hey thats too good for us.  a box is the only fitting thing!

        once apon a midnight dreary, I (Devon the almighty) happened to
 stumble across something that took my breath away.   what was it u ask?
 it... it.... it.... was a......... CARDBOARD BOX!!!!!!  a box which the
 likes i've never seen (and i've seen alot let me tell you!) before then or
 since then.  I was dumbfounded.  I couldn't speak, I was shakin (I was cold,
 it was misty out).  it was amazing!  I had never seem a box so so so nifty
 be4!

        I thought it must be a cop sting (cuz lots of boxes had gone missing
 the past few weeks they say it might be the mob) so I walked around looking
 at the box in awe of its nifftyness.  I looked high I looked low I saw no
 flat feet anywhere, so I slowly bent down and picked up the niffty box and
 ran like the dickens to get it home, cuz it had started to rain.  I finally
 got it home save and sound BUT!!!

         but but but what u ask?  well my smelly lil friend I am about to
 tell you!  I got it home and to my shock and disbelief it had gotten a lil
 wet!  well I freaked running around like a chicken with its head cut off!
 well finally I had a plan: the hairdryer!  ahhh yes u say y didn't u think
 of that?  well cuz your a loser like myself!  but any who I set to work
 trying to dry off the box, and finally after many many minutes it was dry.
 thank god, your probaly sayin to your self.  well I said it to myself too!

        Well with the box safe and dry, it was time to P-A-R-T-Y cuz hey its
 not everyday u come across a box of such nifftyness!  So I called up the
 gang, ya know, jughead, betty, the bee, Ronnie, ya know, the gang, and they
 were dumbfounded by the box!  I couldn't blame them cuz I was too.

        so after a few hours of people fondling the box, Archie showed up
 with a few kegs of beer!  well we started to party and boy did we ever
 party!  Archie got very drunk and took betty in the back to, ya know, get it
 on, and Ronnie was not a happy camper as u can imagine!  but she saw the
 bee!  so he was fat, but hey, she was horny so ya know it happened!

        but any who what is the point of the box?  well nothing really, its
 just there for u to sit in play in and, ya know, do like, ya know, stuff!
 well theres the niffty box, I know you all love it!  u must for the good of
 man-kind u must!  soon my loyal followers, the box will be revealed for all
 to see, but only a few to touch or use!  but I (your almighty leader Devon)
 must go and keep the box safe from all evil doers who wish to take my box
 from me!

        good bye and I hate you all!

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 [ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS!     HOE #761 - WRITTEN BY: DEVON - 7/28/99 ]