💾 Archived View for gemini.spam.works › mirrors › textfiles › magazines › HOE › hoe-0625.txt captured on 2022-06-12 at 12:36:23.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #625
`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8
888 888 888 888 888 "Jack Frost"
888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8
888 888 888 888 888 " by Ashtray Heart
888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 5/9/99
o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
There have already been several movies called Jack Frost:
- A 1950's Russo-Finnish epic done on MST3K
- A 1997 A-Pix straight-to-video horror comedy about a serial
killer transformed into a deadly snowman through toxic waste.
And coming up: Michael Keaton is a heartwarming family man who
dies and is reincarnated as a snowman on Christmas Eve.
SUGGESTIONS FOR MORE MOVIES CALLED JACK FROST:
Mario Van Peebles _is_ Jack Frost. He's a CIA assassin who's tired
of the killing game, but when he tries to get out with his wife, Robin
Givens, Donald Sutherland, head of the CIA, won't let it happen. Featuring
Christopher Walken, Rob Lowe, Robert Downey, Jr., Zack Galligan, Mark Paul
Gosselar (of "Saved by the Bell"), Oscar winner Tatum O'Neal, Mark Hammill,
Costas Mandylor, and introducing "Stone Cold" Steve Austin in his acting
debut!
Jack Frost: A darkly humorous allegory about the end of the world
and nuclear winter featuring Parker Posey, Vince Vaughn, and Craig Sheffer.
Winner of the 1998 Ralston-Purina Dog Chow Mix Art Film Festival Award for
new directors. Basically, despite the "humorous" tag, it's a really
depressing movie where nothing actually happens and people talk on small
sets for 107 minutes while slowly dying of fallout, freezing to death, and
being mutated by low-budget special effects, before a cosmic, spiritual,
and totally nonsensical ending where everybody dies, or at least that seems
to be the implication. We can't tell, becuase the ending doesn't really
make sense. Introducing "Stone Cold" Steve Austin in his acting debut.
From the people who bought you "Money Train":
Steven Baldwin and Malcolm Jamal-Warner are the most unlikely
partners on the LAPD's anti-drug taskforce. Baldwin (Ed Jack) is a
by-the-book cop, Jamal-Warner (LeRoi Frost) is a loose cannon. Can these
two very different cops (I mean, they're different RACES and everything!)
work together to bring down the nefarious drug empire of killer drug dealer
John Malkovich and his deadly drug "Snow"? You'll laugh at the slapstick
antics of these two crazy clown cops, you'll cry as Baldwin's girlfriend
is murdered by Malkovich's minions, you'll cheer as they take down the
entire drug empire of LA with car chases and high-powered explosives!
Introducing "Stone Cold" Steve Austin in his acting debut!
Jack Frost: An erotic thriller that takes guides you through the
darkest desires of one couple's secret fantasies. Julie Strain is a radio
sex therapist married to Eric Roberts, an undercover cop living on the
edge. When Roberts is assigned to investigate the seamy sex clubs of Jack
Frost (played by Lance Henriksen), he finds himself sucked into a dangerous
world of erotic mind games where nothing is what it seems. Introducing
"Stone Cold" Steve Austin in his acting debut, as "Lenny".
When a pharmacist from Florida (Meg Ryan) moves up to chilly British
Columbia after the death of her parents, she's not ready for snow OR
romance. She finds herself smitten, however, with Jack Winchell (Tom
Hanks), a grizzled snowplow operator who the Menominee Creek townsfolk say
has not been quite right since his wife died of cancer a few years back.
Can this culture-shocked sun-lover melt Winchell's heart and overcome her
own grief at the same time? Laughs and tender romance combine in this
bittersweet film by the makers of "Forrest Gump"- "Jack Frost".
Introducing "Stone Cold" Steve Austin as Menominee Creek's feisty mayor.
[--------------------------------------------------------------------------]
[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! #625 - WRITTEN BY: ASHTRAY HEART - 5/9/99 ]