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ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #537
`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8
888 888 888 888 888 "Things That Annoy Me"
888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8
888 888 888 888 888 " by Anilos
888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 3/27/99
o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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1.) Teenage Law Professors who say they're going to sue me.
It's time for a bitch fest, here are some things that really
irritate me. Let's start off with the most boring (to most) topic.
People who claim they'll sue over the most mundane things. (i.e. you say
something in school and some idiotic person claims that's sexual
harassment and can take you to court.)
Here's the two type of people who usually say such things.
Future Lawyer #1: The people who say it, but in a joking manner and
really have no intention of following through.
These people rarely say such a comment but when they
do it is appropriate and maybe even funny somtimes.
Future Lawyer #2: The people who say it, mean it, and have no fucking
idea what they are getting themselves into. They
may not necessarily follow through with the threat
but they always talk about how they're going to take
someone to court on a common basis. This may vary
with how annoyingly moronic the person is.
Why is it so stupid to claim your going to sue someone over
something? There are a number of reasons, it can take months up to years
to just have a pre-trial hearing. The court systems are so backed up with
people who may get ahead of you because their crimes are more serious (and
due process says you are entitled to a fair and speedy trial). Now, truly,
is it really worth the long wait and legal fees to really litigate someone
over an otherwise innane comment or action? Allow me to answer for you,
No, it isn't. If you still want to follow through and try to take someone
to court my advice is this: bring in an arbitrator, settle out of court,
or you can always do what I tell people who want to follow through on this
"Go to the nearest 10+ story building and fling yourself out of window,
because you are a goddamn idiot."
That reminds me of something funny. Ever hear of the "Darwin
Awards"? It's an award given to people who have killed themselves/been
killed in the stupidest ways that it's a blessing they were removed from
the gene pool. One of the winners was a lawyer who was demonstrating the
durability of the building he worked in by leaning against a window. The
window cracked, broke, and he plummeted to his death (some 20 stories I
believe. Can't remember off the top of my head.) Isn't that funny? No?
Well I thought so, go to hell.
2.) My absent minded demeanor.
Hopefully some of you noticed that the point above really had no
closure to it. If you caught it, congratulations, this brings up another
agitating aspect of everyday life. I have a very absent mind, I'll talk
about something then begin talking about a different topic entirely without
ever finish talking about the previous topic. This, however I usually
catch and remedy. But there's just this one process that keeps repeating
itself day after damn day. I go to the DECA snack shack (at my high
school.) and I usually buy the same thing (yes, it's really sad I have a
routine for eating food.) that being, Cookies, donuts, a soda and skittles.
(All essential in a well-balanced, nutritious lunch.) Now, I never start
with the skittles and maybe that's why this happens.. I ALWAYS forget about
the damn skittles. I put them in my backpack and forget about them
totally, only to find them a few days later, after which I proceed to eat
them. One time it got so bad that I essentially had 3 full bags of
skittles scattered all over my house. And it's only with this candy, what
the hell is with that?!
3.) Loud, obnoxious twits.
I'm a quiet person, I enjoy a quiet environment. Unfortunately when
I'm at school, my hopes for a quiet environment are more often than not,
shattered, by these loud assholes who scream to each other on the other
side of the building. But that's not all, It's not constructive
conversation, oh no, can't have that in a high school setting apparently,
they have to yell the most retarded remarks. Comments on how they go so
drunk that weekend or how fucked up they got on drugs, Now, this brings up
my opinion on drugs and alcohol. Alcohol I like, Drugs, I don't like or
do but that does not mean I'm entirely against them. Do what you want,
it's your body, not mine. The funniest aspect of my opinion on drugs and
alcohol is when people start throwing statistics my way explaining how
alcohol is worse than drugs. Let me just spell it out nice and simple here
for those who were about to do that: I DO NOT FUCKING CARE ABOUT YOUR
LAMEASS STATISTICS AND OFF BASE OPINIONS. It seems my absent mind has
kicked in again, let me proceed back to the original point of this whole
bitch session. Here's a example I Just cooked up that I base on a lot of
the things I hear in the hallway everyday.
Person #1 <Screaming to person #2 who is 20 feet away>: Ya I got so
fucking drunk last night and I had sex with about a dozen guys, it was
fucking rad, fuck this fuck that, bla bl bla.
Person #2 <Screams back, apparently is too lazy to walk that far>:
Really? That's real cool, I got fucked up on acid last night and
participated in a wild orgy. I hate being on the pill, it makes me sick.
So forth and so on.
4.) Cover bands that aren't cover bands.
Now, maybe your asking "What the hell are you talking about?" Well
allow me to use my prime example... the band, Godsmack. I'm very sorry to
all of their fans but NEVER in my life have I seen a band so blatantly rip
off a band that was around/still is around. Godsmack is a mock ripoff of
Alice In Chains. Let's look at some little "coincidental" facts:
- Godsmack, the name itself is an alice in chains song on the cd
"Dirt".
- The singer sounds so much like Layne Staley I actually thought it
was a new Alice in chains song when I heard it. Everyone in the
car thought AIC had a new song out.
- The guitars sound like pre "Tripod" with the exclusion of the way
AIC used acoustics in "Sap" and "Jar Of Flies".
- Ironically they show up after Alice in Chains had been on hiatus,
it's my prediction that if AIC ever comes out with a new cd,
they'll disappear into obscurity.
I'm sure I can point out more discrepancies, but I don't really want
to try right now. I realize that a lot of bands out there cannot
necessarily create their own unique sound without being labeled as a
copycat of a band that was around previously, but when they sound THIS
alike it's just far too obvious. I know I was going to write something
else, but I forgot, so I'll quit while I'm still ahead.
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #537 - WRITTEN BY: ANILOS - 3/27/99 ]