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ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #506
`888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8
888 888 888 888 888 "Hypothetical Question"
888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8
888 888 888 888 888 " by Z
888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 3/8/99
o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8
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As I sit in the Service Center of a non-distinguished Gateway
Country Store, I watch my managers run around directing people to tuck
their evil uniform shirts in and to smile when a customer enters the
store.
I have come close to falling asleep at my post a plethora of times,
only to be waken by the occasional musical stylings of Barbara Streisand
blasting from the stereo speakers of an entirely too powerful machine as
an entirely too commission based salesperson attempts to make the machine
seem user-friendly to an entirely too ignorant elderly man.
I stare out the window, watching the potential customers come and
go when the phone rings.
"Thank you for calling Gateway Country, how may i help you?" I
mumble into the receiver.
"HI! I have a hypothetical question for you", says the man on the
other end, excitedly.
"Oh? How hypothetical is hypothetical?" I ask.
Ignoring my comment, the man proceeds to ask me a myriad of
questions regarding the installation of a chip he has HEARD about which,
when sodered onto the board of a Recordable CD_rom allows the copying of
Sony Playstation Games. It seems a FRIEND of his has attempted to
"upgrade" her CD-R in this fashion, but was unfamiliar with the fine art
of sodering, and managed to make the CDR inoperable (as in the damn thing
won't even open anymore cos of the lump of metal lodged in the tray).
"Now", he continues, "If my my friend were to say, own a Gateway,
and it was the CDR on the Gateway that is no longer functioning, would you
all replace the CDR for her?"
Then he rambles in coherently, "Cos I really think that you should
replace the CDR, cos you have a warranty and are always saying you replace
things. I am entitled to a replacement CDR."
THE END.
DO NOT EVER WORK IN A CUSTOMER SERVICE BASED FIELD BECAUSE YOU
ALWAYS END UP HATING MANKIND.
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[ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #506 - WRITTEN BY: Z - 3/8/99 ]