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'##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
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##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #489 !!
#########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS! !!
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##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "Head Full of Garbage" !!
##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Mutter !!
..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 2/10/99 !!
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it's dark in here. where am i; oh yeah, i remember now. i'm
sprawled out on my floor with my head in a trashcan; i can hear people in
my room... maybe ten, possibly a hundred. i can hear what they're saying
but don't understand. they're talking garbled laughter. poor trashcan.
poor, sweet trashcan. when my head's in you i feel safe. why do you
smell like vomit? oh yeah, cause i vomited... maybe twice, possibly a
hundred times. my head's in a trashcan. my stomach's in hell. no.
hell's much warmer. damn me. No, my stomach's in the sea. i can feel
the waves. god almighty can't stop the waves. why do i do this to
myself? CRASh. i suck.
"Is Chris dead?"
"Umm... we dunno"
"Okay, well, see ya all later."
Bastards. in my own room. in my own trashcan. not in my head,
though. they'll never get that far. i just lied (that's how I got here).
how long have i been here? five....ten...fifteen minutes. tomorrow
they'll say for hours. they'll be right. i have to hide (in my own
skin?). i shouldn't be seen. thank you, trashcan. someone's smacking
the back of my head and yelling at me. someone else says to leave me
alone and the smacking stops. why'd i buy black trash bags? everyone
else has white. what a freak. (twelve miles away I see the happy joy frat
boy who has a white bag) this bag is way too big for this
trashcan.
Broken clock
Just because I don't hear it ticking doesn't mean that
time has stopped
I miss the innocence the peace of mind
that piece of mind I can no longer find
O dark valentine I've lost so much to your dark light I'm up to my knees
in shattered pain to those last few minutes after midnight The less
you have to do the less you'll get done O dark valentine will you be
one More time You do this to me every time Not again.
"Whoa. What's Chris doing?"
"He's passed out."
i try to say "No i'm not" but my lips won't move. finally, the
words manifest themselves in the form of vomit. where the fuck's all
this liquid coming from? I don't remember but the sea has an infinite
amount of liquid (no, it doesn't... but who's counting?) the fools-gold-
-chattering continues. i hear a burst of laughter and suddenly
everything freezes. was i awake just now? this has to be a dream in my
head. in my trashcan head.
as a wise pimp once told me, 'when your head's in a trashcan
there's no place to go but up up and away.' very true. very crude. the
two are often the same. someone's pulling me out of my trashcan
sanctuary. No. don't pull me from my warm trashcan. No. i want to
live there. i know i can't but please don't pull me out. they do it
anyway. it was inevitable. into the cold world. into the tic-toc slave
rhythm. put me back in utero, fucker!
"Here, drink this."
oh, it's . . . umm, it's you. good old you. you were always a
good friend. we had our disagreements... i might have cursed at you
earlier tonight but you know i didn't mean it, right? thank you, you.
you and my trashcan. that's all i need. we can take on the entire
world together! they despise me. you should know that. but, united we'll
have an ass big enough for all of them to kiss.
Don't ya see? I've helped you when your head was dead and now you
do the same for me. i drink the water. where'd all the people go? i
stand up and get knocked on the ground by a wave. thanks for catching
me, you. i know you have to go... have a good nightmorning! is it time
to sleep yet? i catch a dizzy glimpse of my room. it looks like someone
had a good time in here... oh yeah, it was me. who the fuck's going to
clean this up? fucking pizza boxes and broken glass. ten million
cigarettes and 42 cigars. youth of america, i weep for you. i mean me.
trashcan, you'll help me, won't you?
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!! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #489, WRITTEN BY: MUTTER - 2/10/99 !!