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 '##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!!
  ##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: ===========================================
  ##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #393 !!
  #########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS!  !!
  ##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: ===========================================
  ##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "Let's Be Friends"                       !!
  ##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Hal08                              !!
 ..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 12/28/98                                 !!
 !!========================================================================!!

 Chiqz: "Hey, Hal08, can we have your baby?"
    Me: "Yeah."
 Chiqz: "Wait, nevermind... I'd rather be your friend."

        See, I'm great.  I get chicks, well, some what.  As soon as I
 say that _I like you_ to them, they reply in sheer wittyness:

        "Erik, your really cute, and your really sweet... I dont want to
 ruin what we got going on now."

        What's up with that, yoe#!?@!?!@  Goldy the Pimp Daddy would say,
 "friends my ass, soon as you pay that thirty yew owe me, slut!@?"  But
 I'm not Goldy the Pimp Daddy.  Or maybe if I was some sort of movie star
 I would just explain that she won't be in my next all-star action movie
 that was exactly like the last one I made.

        But guess what?

        I'm not that either.

        Would I be some kind of a jerk to say, "let's not start talking
 if your just looking for a friend."  It's not like I hate having
 friends, if you ever was good friends with a girl that you were
 extremely attracted to, you may know how I feel.

 Chiqz: "See, isn't it better that we're friends?  We never have to break
        up, and we don't have to be aukward about things.  See, friends
        can do much more than a girlfriend can."
 Jesus: "You see, if only you rejected sex and praised the lord, this
        would be of utter importance!  The Lord never rejects!@"
    Me: "Er... uhh.. shut up."
 Chiqz: "Understand?"
 Jesus: "Well, answer the girl!"

        Now, the lord would be great, but I want to have sex.  A lot.
 "Somewhere out there," as Feivel the mouse said, I guess there's
 someone that wants more than a friend.  Maybe there just confused like
 me.  Girls are just so wacky it's repulsive.  Or maybe if I looked out
 the window and sang like that piece of shit mouse, I'd find love.
 What's up with that fucker's hat, anyways?

        "Shut the fuck up, I like my hat!"

        Well, I just turned 16 and I've been so busy working I didn't
 even realize it was my birthday till my mother wished me a happy one.
 I could say life sucks, but you know it does... you're not stupid.  I
 know I'm wrong but when your sitting on the job with nothing to do,
 your mind wanders.  When all you have is time to think, you can't help
 but ask yourself questions that have easy answers, but the answers you
 have are wrong because you hope they are.  As i think, i just use up
 the time left to think.

 Game show host:  "For 500 dollars, will you go on life seeking a girl
                  to love you, or even like you for that matter, or
                  will they all just be your friend?"

        Who am I kidding?  I know that I'll find someone someday, but
 you gotta look on the bad side of things.  Can't sit there all day
 thinking about the good side of things!  Can't live your life on wishes
 is what I always say, but you can live your life on fishes.

        "Stick to veggies, they clean out your system better!"

        I guess that small shimmer of hope is all any one of us has.  As
 much I thought the Olympics sucked, they have a pretty good concept with
 that torch of theres.  When it goes on, it signifys the begining.  That
 first arrow is like your first dream, your first goal.  Now when that
 flame goes out, so does the game end.  If you don't have that hope, I
 guess, the game's over.

        "I hope you shut your fucking mouth."

        Okay.

 Chiqz: "One of us is waiting?!@!?@?!"
    Me: "Grrr!??@!  you probably live in Rhode Island.  Rhode Island sucks, 
        I dont even think it's a fucking island!?@#"

 Newscaster: "Uhh, guess what everyone...?  The apocylypse is like now,
             so you're all in somewhat of a predicament.  Will the
             last people on earth please shut out the light?"

 !!========================================================================!!
 !! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS!      #393 - WRITTEN BY: HAL08 - 12/28/98 !!