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MONEY INCORPORATED DIGEST #44
RELEASED 27 APRIL 1995
WRITTEN BY SLEEPY
MONEY INCORPORATED ARE: SLEEPY
SONIC FURY
CCRIDER
THE BIG CHEESE
JULIO (FORMERLY METHOD MAN)
ORGASMIC ANOMALY
SEXECUTIONER
TODAY'S TOPIC: JEW THE JEWS, OR HOW TO GET A GOOD DEAL ON ANYTHING
Last episode of our bargaining lessons, I explained how to act intelligent to
get a salesman to cut a better deal on something. While I prefer getting
things for free, that's not always possible. Good social engineering skills
are necessary to get anything these days. Otherwise, well-trained salesmen
will rip you a new asshole. Believe me, I used to sell cars...car salesmen
are the lowest scum on earth. But, I'll deal with that later, first the second
technique in bargaining.
PART TWO: ACT STUPID
This method will drive salesmen batty. First, when you examine the product
don't say anything good about it, if possible. When the salesman asks quesions
about how you like it, say "It's alright..." or "Fine, just fine..." Never
volunteer information. Don't act like you know more than he does about the
product. Then when he tries to "close" on you, say "I don't think I want to
buy this today..." He'll start to sweat and ask more questions. Don't give
solid answers. Doing this he will usually start to bargain, which he might
not have done otherwise. The trick here is not to get excited about the
product, no matter how you like it.
PART THREE: SALES TACTICS
Well, like I said before, I have sold cars. If a car lot does not have a list
of cars' prices or have the prices posted, you can bet that they are trying
to "gross" you. Doing this, the salesman will add money to the actual price
of the car and then if you bargain you end up paying full sticker anyway. If
you pay more, then you really get ripped. Ask to see the salesman's actaul
copy of the prices. If he don't want to show it, leave. Tell him you
know about this practice, and that you know it happens all the time. He
might get offended, but who cares? Car salesmen are scum. They don't even
treat each other with honesty, much less us. Fuck em!
Next before you even negotiate price, ask to see the invoice...they will really
bitch here, but who gives a fuck! When you get an offer for a price, ask for
a signed Buyers' Order. This is not a legal document, so go ahead and sign
it. Do NOT give a deposit...it's not required. If they say that the car
might get sold, say "I don't care....I'll just go somewhere else." If they
won't give a buyers' order don't buy from them. When you get the order, take
it to another dealer and do the same. Then keep shopping till you get the best
price.
Now, be aware that you won't get much off a new car, but used cars can be
discounted quite a bit. Especially unpopular models, like big cars or ugly
colors.
Using your newly found knowledge, go out and make those mother fuckers work
for you! And remember, Win if you may, lose if you must; but always, always
cheat!
COPYWRONG 1995 MONEY INC HOLDINGS LTD.
All rights reversed.
MONEY INCORPORATED ARE: SLEEPY
SONIC FURY
CCRIDER
THE BIG CHEESE
JULIO (FORMERLY METHOD MAN)
ORGASMIC ANOMALY
SEXECUTIONER