💾 Archived View for gemini.spam.works › mirrors › textfiles › magazines › VAS › vas0084.txt captured on 2022-06-12 at 15:22:25.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? ??????????????????????? ?? ? ????? ????? ?????????????????????????????? ?
? ????????????????????????? ?? ? ? ? ????? ?????????????????????????????? ?
? ??????????????????????????? ?? ? ????? ? ?????????????????????????????? ?
? ????????????????????????????? ?? ? ? ????? ?????????????????????????????? ?
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? Vaginal and Anal Secretions Newsletter #0084 ?
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? Date Released : [09/03/92] Author: EnGleBuRG hUmPerDinK ?
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? A GUiDe tO KiLLiNg YuPPiES ?
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
Welcome again. I Know your probably sitting there Wondering, Who
The Fuck Engleburg Humperdink is. SO am I. But that isn't the point isn't
it? EngleBurg is Frying, and is watching his face burn into the Monitior as
He Types. NOW, back to vAs......
I hate where I live. Its bad enuff with the Naygroes and Wetbacks, but
what makes it worse is the influx of YuPpIe C0rper-RAt slime, and especially,
There runny nosed, Terminal-Mousse-Abuse offspring, which I hafta co-exist
with. They go to my school, and Try to blend in(I'd rather shove them in
a Blender Myself, heh) By Becoming a Goddamn Fashion Catalog by showing of
there GNarrrrly Frosh Stussy and Bugle Boy threads. Not only that, but a Large
Portion of the YuppiE Scum, In there Attempts to be Overly REBellIoUS,
DanGerOuS dewds, They Become Wiggers, Or Worse, FlAmInG POserS. An Example,
Thou I Think Skate Punks are Dweebs, I Belive that they are at least Honest in
There Beliefs. Until This One Greasy fuck, WHo WAs 2 weeks before this
incident, was a Dance Rappin' man(He's White) Saw that Skate PUnkS Were Gettin
More of the Rad Wemen cuz of there fucked up clothes(THouse 4 color Pants
and those LaMe Bald Natzie Hairdoos Must Drive Chicks Wild, But the Only Ones
I've Seen hangin' Around Skate punks are 14 year Old SlUtS) Decides he wants
to StoP Jerking his thumb Pud for once, and Actually get LaiD. So He Gets a
NEW Skate Board (150 Dollers fer a Piece of Fucking WOOD??? HAHAHA) a Bald
Head, and Trashes his M.C. Hammer Duds for some Truly Funky Thrashin' Clothes
that he picks up at Some Overpriced Trend Shop in Laguna Beach, with the
Capacino Machine in the Back. OF Course, he Puts it on his Daddies, Corporate
Card..... By Now you've probably got a Few Ideas about the types of Loosers
I'm Talking About. Now, Getting Rid of them is the Hard Part. You could
blow up all the Coffee houses in your County, But in Mine there Too fucking
Numerous. This is My Tale of How to strike Back......
GO TRASHinG. Yuppies are lousy with paper, they Use Computers Now Adays.
Watcha do is get all there Credit Returns, Fone Numbers, and intresting
Tid Bits. You'll Probably find a Coupla Credit Renewal Forms(You get
them when your old card Expires) Gold Card, Anyone?
BuRgLarIzE ThErE RESidEnceS: This is Easier than Hell. There Security
Systems are Pretty Tough thou. Not Recommended for Beginners, But
People With Experience will soon be up to there Necks in BRAND NeW
COmPuTeR EqUiPmEnT, CelLULaR FoNeS, FaX MACHiNEs, TV'S, MiCroWAVeS, etc.
(How do you think I got My NEW 486/33? Ehhehehehe)
STeAl TheRe MAsErAtI's, MerCedeS, BMW's, FerRaRi's Etc.(or at Least fuck
them up Beyond Recognition): Yuppies are Stupider than Most folks
when it comes to Auto Security. Sure they Have s00peRd00peR VipER 9
zillion Turbo Alarms. But so do I Now. They park them on Dark streets,
And I've gotten at least 5 nifty audio systems cuz some lame fuck left
his doors unlocked. Steal them and Drive them into walls. ForigEin
Communist Jap Rice Burnin' And Douche bag kraut cars are Bad for the US
EcOnOmy. YOUR DOIN' THE COUNTRY A FAVOR!
Go into The Pac*Bell Manholes(We Don't HAve POlEs where I live) and
Make Calls to the US Consulate in Every Nation on Earth. Those Poor
Government Employees Need a Little Encouragement from home.
Oh, the New Trend is the YupPie GaNgSterS. shoot them in the head till
there Faces become an Unrecognizable Red Stain. These fuckers are
beggin' to Die.
Disclaimer:<YAWN> I EnglEburg Humperdink aka Nocturnus, Being of Unsound
Mind, and Invisible Body, Hearby Declare that IF you use this File For
Purposes other than YuPpIE Destruction, you are Worthless Hack, And
Possible Member of the International Conspiracy against Hullcinagins.
You are there by a Tratior to Humanity, and the Flourecent Caribou
Society, and Must BEcome one of Your Pet Chinchillas Pubic Hair.
Take Strange Drugs, Swallow your Pride,
IT's All but a Game, NUcleAR Stockpiles.....
NO CARRIER
????????[ VaS DiSTRiBuTioN SiTeS ]????????
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? BBS Name Number Baud Sysop Title ?
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? LiVe WiRE BBS (313)464-1470 14.4 Studmuffin World HQ ?
? Floating Pancreas (305)551-0311 14.4 Majestic Cockster Dist. #1 ?
? Midian BBS (703)790-8048 14.4 The Raging Golemn Dist. #2 ?
? CHaoTiC BeHaVioR (717)652-7096 16.8 Chaos Dist. #3 ?
? Land Of Silence (418)687-2448 14.4 Coaxial Karma Dist. #4 ?
? WiLD CHiLD BBS (616)538-0167 16.8 Stone Cold Dist. #5 ?
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? VaS Voice Mail Box ... (313) 910-3030 ... Toll Free In Michigan! ?
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? Studmuffin can be reached via internet at the address: dmitchel@ais.org ?
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
? And To Reach us Via U.S. Mail, Send Letters To: ?
? VaS World Headquarters ?
? P.O. Box 530768 ?
? Livonia,MI 48153 ?
???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????