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? Vaginal and Anal Secretions Newsletter #0034 ?
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? Date Released : [06/28/92] Author: ]<0oL D0oD ?
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? The Guide To Lamerz. ?
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Lamerz. L0oZers. Computer Geeks. We all know them. They are all over
our bbs's (Both PD and Elite). They seem to be put on earth only to bother
the "real" users.
In this issue, I am going to describe a few type of lamers so you
know what you are dealing with.
WaReZ Lamer: This is the teenage lamer who thinks that to be cool,
he need to run a WaReZ bbs <OF course 0 days warez>. They spend
thousands of dollars on their 486-50mhz 16.8k dual standards and
2 gig hard drives, and spend thousands of dollars each month calling
long distance just to get the new warez. Then they think they are
better than everyone in the world, including local users, which
brings us to the next lamer...
No-Locals Lamer: This is the lamer who thinks his board is SO fucking
good (For some reason) that local users don't even deserve to get
access. Thus, he ends up with lots of LD leeches who never post any
messages (who can afford to?), or even upload (Because the no-locals
lamer doesn't have file ratios for Ld users). Of course nobody wants
to voice-validate all the LD users , so local users can logon saying
they are calling from some foreign country and the sysop will
totally kiss their ass.
I'm-a-Hacker-Lamer: This is the lamer who for some reason, thinks
he is an experienced phreaker or hacker because he puts h/p/c on
all his bbs ads and has about 100 textfiles on his board. And
all the users on his h/p/c areas have no idea what phreaking even
is, they just post stupid messages like "pleez giVe mE sOmE c0DeZZZ
d0oDZ".
The PD Lamer: I dont think I even need to elaborate on this one. This
is the user that for some reason things PD software is awesome.
Granted, some of it is decent, but 99% of it is shit. These are the
sysops that dont deserve to run a bbs.
The Leech Lamer: This is rather obvious. This is the user who calls,
BEGS for no ratio, and when you give it to him, he waits till 3am to
call and does HUGE batch downloads <And if there is a ratio, he
uploads shit files - duplicates renamed to other names>, because he
thinks you won't notice if he does it REAL late.
The Mr. Cool Lamer: This is the guy that always brags about how he
goes to parties every night, fucks 500 girls a day, has more friends
then any 'computer geeks', yet he seems to spend 24 hours a day either
calling boards or logging locally onto his board and playing online
games. This is the person who deserves ansi bombs and viruses the
most.
The New Elite Lamer: This is the 'elite' person who decides he is
elite suddenly and calls you board telling you to give him elite
access and he will give you all the nEw WaReZ. These are usually 12
or 13 year olds who cant type faster than my grandmother and are
calling at 1200 baud.
The BBS-Advertising Lamer: This is the lamer who calls every single
board in a net , or in his area, and posts all 5 of his shitty looking
ansis that he made himself over and over every single day. These are
the ads that say "PLEASE CALL MY COOL BOARD. (593)133-3153. 1200/2400
baud! loTs oF NeaT uSerZ and C0oL messagez d00dz. I have 20 Megs and
another 10 megs on floppy disks!!!!!!!". They deserve lots of fake
users who upload viruses.
Welp, thats about all I can think of, those are some of the lamers I
have experienced in my 7 years of modeming so far. Im sure as the years come
along, there will be more and more types, if I forgot any, let me know...
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And by the way fellow VaS readers... I thought you may want to check
this out: The 1992 Loompanics Unlimited Catalog <This is a HUGE publisher/
distributor of "underground" types of books>... Only $5 to:
Loompanics Unlimited!
P.O. Box 1197
Port Townsend, WA 98368
When requesting the catalog, be sure to tell them that you heard
about it from VaS <That'll get 'em wondering!>.
????????[ VaS DiSTRiBuTioN SiTeS ]????????
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? BBS Name Number Baud Sysop Title ?
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? LiVe WiRE BBS (313)464-1470 14.4 Studmuffin World HQ ?
? PoT BBS (313)462-1906 24oo Phreak_Accident World HQ ?
? TcH BBS (713)373-4031 14.4 One Meg Cacher Dist. #1 ?
? Floating Pancreas (305)551-0311 14.4 Majestic Cockster Dist. #2 ?
? Restricted Domain (313)656-8519 14.4 Darkness Dist. #3 ?
? Phantasm III (313)884-2617 14.4 Scavenger Dist. #4 ?
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