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FILE ON MARGIN IS 76 STATUS: ALL ALLOWED NUMBER OF LINES: 629 1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask.... 2 ********************** REMOVED: 24 DEC 83 ****************************** 3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System) Mike Day System operator 4 ************************************************************ 5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION PLACED ON 6 THIS SYSTEM. 7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privatly owned 8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public. 9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. 10 It is intended that the system be normally used for messages and 11 advertisments by the users. As the system is privately owned, I retain the 12 right to remove any and all messages which I may find offensive 13 to me. Additionally because of the limited size of the system, it will be 14 periodically purged of older messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved) 15 The saved information will be cycled to drive 'B' while the information on 16 drive 'B' will be archived, and a fresh disk will be installed in drive 'A'. 17 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out 18 of the enter mode. The message is automaticly stored. 19 If after entering the message you find you made a mistake, 20 use the replace command to replace the line. 21 To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up. 22 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system. 23 ======================================== 24 25 DARN PESKY INJUNS! THEY DON'T EVEN DRINK TEA! 26 ============================================= 27 ARE WE HERE AGAIN CLYDE? 28 I TOLD YOU I WANTED THE 4TH DIMENSION. THIS MUST BE THE THIRD!!! 29 LOOK AT HOW WIERD THESE PEOPLE ARE. 30 AND LOOK AT THAT...SOMETHING 31 ABOUT 'INJUNS' THIS IS WIERD. GET ME OUT OF HERE CLYDE 32 33 Yes, Clyde, and teach him how to spell "weird" while you are at it. 34 /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\ 35 SOMEONE LEAVE ME A NOTE PLEASE...IF THERE IS 36 ANYONE OUT THERE....... 37 BOBBY. 38 \/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/ 41 +%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%%#%#%#%#% 42 BOBBY- HI, I AM JODY. I HAVE BEEN GONE FROM THIS SSTEM FOR A WHILE BUT AM 43 BACK NOW I SUPOSE I WILL STICK AROUND FOR A WHILE. WELL, HOW DO YOU LIKE 44 THE INN SO FAR? 45 46 ALL- WHERE'S DOM? STILL GONE? 47 48 #%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%##%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%#%# 49 50 YOU EVER NOTICE HOW ON ALL THE CEREAL COMMERCIALS THEY CLAIM THEIR 51 RAISONS ARE "~'PLUMP AND JUICY'? IF THIS WAS TRUE, THEY WOULDN'T BE RAISONS 52 THEY WOULD BE GRAPES AGAIN! WHY IS THIS THAT THEY THINK WE LIKE GRAPES 53 INSTEAD OF RAISONS? 54 I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW. 55 Andy Roony 56 hello my name is jim, this is the first time i have been on your system, tha 57 exit 58 break 62 help 63 goodby 64 off 65 exit 66 bye 67 HI JIM! THIS IS LOTS OF FUN. STICK AROUND AND I THINK YOU WILL SEE WHAT I ME 68 AN,~. YOU CAN LEAVE ALL KINDS OF STUFF. THE ONLY PROBLEM IS, 69 SOMETIMES IT IS HARD TO FIND THINGS. 70 71 ############################################################### 72 73 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 74 * IMAGINATION ALERT * 75 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 76 * FI GDM - TO NEXT MESSAGE * 77 * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 78 79 80 ************************************************************** 81 ****** ****** 82 **** **** 83 ** INSIDE BACKWATER ** 84 * (The Untold Story * 85 86 87 A number of recent messages from newcomers showed an interest 88 in learning more about what Backwater Messages is all about. 89 Though relatively new myself I've picked up enough information 90 to give a fair idea of what's going on. I'll leave it to the 91 oldtimers to jump in and correct any factual errors I might 92 make. 93 94 It is a fascinating story that begins in the middle east. For 95 many years Syria's President Hafez Assad wasn't concerned 96 about having a strong intelligence presence in the United 97 States. However, with he growing American presence in Lebanon 98 he grew alarmed at his inablity to get solid intelligence 99 about the west. 100 101 He decided he needed a network of agents familiar enough 102 with western mores and cultural values to make sense of 103 the psychology of American Imperialism. To train his new 104 agents he turned to an independent American arms dealer who 105 who dealt in computer equipment on the side. Between the two 106 of them they set up the network you are now monitoring. 107 108 Across America there are 165 computer bullitin boards 109 similar to Backwater Messages that are used for the training 110 of Syrian Agents. Up to 80% of participants of systems like 111 Backwater are Americans. The remaining 20% are "characters" 112 controlled by Syrian agents, who in turn are controlled by 113 Soviet psychologists trained in high tech foriegn espionage. 114 115 Each Syrian spy has four characters, each with a different 116 personality, that he manipulates to learn American response 117 patterns. Each agent is controled by a Psychologist who 118 supervises all entries and monitors all American reactions. 119 120 In following Backwater Messages it can be difficult to tell 121 the Americans from the Syrians. 122 123 Here are some tips: 124 125 1) Because Syria has a limited number of 126 educated people they must recruit agents 127 from the aristocracy. Consequently, Syrian 128 agents are often arrogant and rude...though 129 not always. 130 131 2) Syrian agents can sometimes be spotted 132 by their limited sense of humor and abhorance 133 of anything imaginative. 134 135 3) Syrian Agents can not speak Pig Latin 136 137 138 I hope this information has been helpful to those of you who 139 are new. If you have any further questions feel free to ask. 140 141 142 143 GRAND DRAGON MASTER 144 145 * * 146 ** ** 147 **** **** 148 ****** ****** 149 *************************************************************** 150 GDM - You are welcome...just trying to be nice. 151 *************************************************************** 152 YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING. 153 WHAT IN THE WORLD IS THIS RUBBISH? 154 I HAVE BEEN CONNECTED WITH THE RUUSIAN KGB AND WE GOT NO NEWS OF THIS 155 INVOLB~VEMENT IN AMERICAN MATERS~~~TERS. I CAN ASSURE YOU ALL, WE HAVE NO 156 INTENTIONS OF INVADING YOUR PRIVACY. YOUR PRESIDENTS~'S PRIVACY IS ANOTHER 157 MATTER. THE SYRIANS HAVE THEIR OWN PROBLEMS. THEY GO AROUND WITH TOWELS 158 ON THER~IR HEADS ALL DAY. 159 WE APPRECIATE YOUR EASY ACCESS AND ANY MILITARY SECRECTS YOU CARE TO 160 SHARE WILL BE WELCOME. 161 162 I.M. RED -RUSSIAN KGB 163 OFF 164 165 166 *************************************************************** 167 168 Meryln: 169 170 Walt Disney called and wanted to know 171 when you're going to show us your imagination. 172 He cancelled two meetings with Donald Duck so 173 he would be available to monitor your stuff. I 174 don't know if I can keep him interested much 178 longer. 179 180 181 Grand D. 182 183 ************************************************************** 184 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 185 ARGHH! 186 187 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 188 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 189 WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE HAVE NO IMAGINATION OR SENSE OF HUMOR; 190 YOU RUNNING IMPERIALIST DOG! 191 MOHAMMED WASSIR 192 P.S. THIS IS AN ALBANIAN NET NOT A SYRIAN ONE! 193 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 194 Long live Jimmy Hoffa...<glub> <glub> 195 196 SAY BROS! WHAT'S HAPPININ' MAN. STAY KOOL BLOOD STAY KOOL. THIS BE A BROTHER 197 I SAID THIS BE A BROTHER'S NET. NOW DON'T NONW~E OF YOU COMMIES COME 198 STEPPIN' THROUGH HERE AND MESS IT UP YA HERE? 199 STAY LK~~KOOL BROS. 200 WE BE STEPPIN' ON. 201 PRIMEMINISTER 202 ************************************************************************** 203 204 I FEEL MORE LIKE I DO NOW THAN BEFORE I CAME! 205 206 R.F. 207 208 ************************************************************************** 209 210 211 212 DID YOU EVER NOTICE HOW IN THE CARTOONS, WHEN THE CHARACTERS FALL OFF A ~CLIFF HOW THEY HANG FOR A WILE BEFORE THEY FALL? 213 WHY IS THIS ? COULD IT BE THAT THEY ARE LIGHTER THAN US? WHY CAN'T WE DO THIS TOO? 214 MAYBE IT IS A RUSSIAN SECRET THAT NEEDS LOOKING INTO. 215 IT BOTHERS ME. I WOULD LIKE T ~O KNOW ~WHY WE CAN'T DO THAT. 216 217 218 Andy Roony 219 220 ************************************************************** 221 222 Andy: 223 224 Cartoon characters are not lighter 225 than humans. The floating in air phenomonon 226 is created by the scientific fact that 227 cartoon environments are heavier. 228 229 Mickey 230 231 ************************************************************** 233 HEY.... LIKE THAT'S REAL HEAVY MAN!........ 234 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 235 well, so far you people have done nothing to impress me. 236 Don't bother reponding to that coment because I will never read it. This is the first and last time I ever come here again. 237 238 :::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::mucked up:::::::::::::: ::::::::::::::::: 239 240 WELL NOW! 241 242 FIRST OF ALL I NOTICE HOW THE LAST TEN MESSAGES OR SO HAVE BEEN SPRINKLED 243 EVERY OTHER MESSAGE OR SO BY A LITTLE FUNNY MARK LIKE THE ONE MY MODEM 244 MAKES WHEN THE CARRIER BREAKS. ON SOME KEYBOARDS THIS IS THE CHARACTER 245 FOR 'APPROXIMATELY'. FROM THE WAY THEY APPEARED, I GUESS THAT IS THE 246 MARK SOMEBODIES TERMINAL MAKES WHEN THEY TRY TO ERASE SOMETHING, AND THEY 247 ARE NOT AWARE THAT THE TEXT IS NOT BEING ERASED. THIS MEANS THAT ALL OF 248 THOSE MESSAGES MAY HAVE BEEN LEFT BY THE SAME PERSON. ALSO I NOTE THAT 249 NATASHA, BIG BILL BROOZY AND SO ON HAVE DISSAPPEARED (MUCH TO OUR DISMAY, 250 I'M SURE)(I LIKED 'EM ANYWAY) BUT THAT THE GRAND DRAGONMASTER MAKES 251 LITTLE BOXES AND THINGS JUST LIKE BIG BILLS BOXES. 252 253 SO I THINK WE HAVE HERE MAYBE TWO PEOPLE TALKING THROUGH TEN CHARACTERS 254 EACH, OR MAYBE JUST ONE BODY WITH TWENTY PERSONALITIES WHO ONLY GET 255 TOGETHER HERE ON BWMS. 256 257 IF THERE REALLY IS JUST ONE PERSON AND TWENTY PERSONALITIES, IT FIGURES 258 THAT THE PERSON IN QUESTION IS ACCUSING THE REST OF US OF BEING MESSED 259 UP. PEOPLE USUALLY THINK THE OTHER PERSON IS MESSED UP, NO MATTER WHAT. 260 PEOPLE DON'T SEEM TO CHANGE MUCH, EVEN IF THEY SUFFER FROM 261 DODECAPERSONALITONIA (GIVEN BY MY DICTIONARY AS 'HAVING EITHER 262 TWENTY OR TWELVE PERSONALITIES, DEPENDING ON HOW YOU LOOK AT IT') 263 264 WHAT REALLY UPSETS ME IS BEING MADE A DUPE BY THE SYRIANS. I AM SURE THEY 265 PLANTED THE NOTICE FROM THE 'ALBANIANS'. I AM SO UPSET THAT I AM GOING 266 TO WRITE A LETTER TO THE SYRIAN AMBASSADOR IN PROTEST, IN FACT. IN 267 MY LETTER I WILL GIVE THE AMBASSADOR A GOOD TONGUE LASHING. THAT 268 WILL CERTAINLY SHOW HIM. 269 270 WHICH WAY DID THEY GO, GEORGE? WHICH WAY DID THEY GO? 271 272 AN INTELLIGENT PERSON MAY SHOW A DISPOSITION TO GIVE ANY IDEA A FAIR TRIAL, 273 CONSIDERING EVEN THE MOST REDICULOUS IDEA IN DETAIL BEFORE REJECTING 274 IT. THIS IS KNOWN AS BEING OPEN MINDED. 275 276 A CROCKER SPANIEL CAN BE VERY OPEN MINDED AND INTELLIGENT, I THINK. 277 AT LEAST, WHENEVER I DISCUSS THE SOUND OF ONE HAND CLAPPING WITH MY 278 CROCKER SPANIEL, OR REQUIRE HIM TO CONSIDER SOME OF MERLYN'S IDEAS 279 ABOUT PHILOSOPHY AND MEANINGFUL DISCOURSE, MY CROCKER SPANIEL LOOKS 280 VERY INTELLIGENT INDEED. 281 282 HE NEVER REJECTS AN IDEA OUT OF HAND, OR WALKS AWAY IN THE MIDDLE OF 283 A RANT I AM GIVING. HE APPEARS TO HANG ON EACH AND EVERY WORD I 284 AM SAYING, GIVING ME A VERY THOUGHTFUL, EVEN YOU MIGHT SAY A 285 VERY PERPLEXED LOOK. AFTER I AM DONE, HE GOES OVER TO HIS FAVORITE RUG 286 TO SIT AND THINK ABOUT IT ALL. SOMETIMES HE CAN REALLY THINK UP A 287 STORM. WHEN HE REALLY THINKS HARD HE DOESN'T MOVE AT ALL FOR 288 LONG PERIODS OF TIME, EXCEPT TO SCRATCH AND TAKE A LOT OF THOSE DEEP 289 DOGGY BREATHS THAT THEY TAKE WHEN THEY ARE LAYING ON THERE SIDES 290 WITH THEIR TONGUES HANGING OUT LIKE BIG PINK SLUGS. 291 292 MY DOGGIE IS AT THE VETRINARIANS NOW. HE WAS THINKING OVER SOME OF 293 THAT HEAVY ZEN-TYPE STUFF I LAID ON HIM LIKE "EVERYTHING I TELL YOU 294 IS A LIE" THAT I GOT FROM MERLYN. AFTER A WHILE HE WAS THINKING 295 REALLY HARD AND I NOTICED HE WAS REALLY QUIET. 296 297 OH,OH, I THOUGHT. TO MUCH SATORI, OR SOMETHING. 298 299 THE VET SAYS HE IS IN A COMA. PRETTY SOON I WILL HAVE TO DECIDE ON 300 WHETHER TO PULL THE PLUG ON ALL THOSE RESPIRATORS, PLASMA DRIPS, AND 301 OTHER THINGS THAT ARE KEEPING HIM GOING. I AM HOPING I WON'T HAVE TO GO 302 BEFORE THE SUPREME COURT OR THE ASPCA OR THE ANTI-VIVISECTION LEAGUE 303 OR SOME GROUP OF WELL MEANING SOLONS LIKE THAT. 304 305 ANYWAY, I THOUGHT I HAD BETTER CALL UP AND WARN YOU ALL BEFORE IT'S 306 TOO LATE. THERE APPEARS TO BE A DRAWBACK TO BEING A LITTLE TOO OPEN 307 MINDED. I HAVE A FEW SUGGESTIONS. 308 309 1) IF YOU RUN INTO THE PHRASE "THINK ABOUT IT", DON'T. 310 311 2) IF YOU READ THE PHRASE "I HATE TO TELL YOU THIS, BUT...", DON'T 312 LET THEM TELL YOU. THEY'LL FEEL BETTER, TOO. 313 314 3) FINALLY, IF SOMEONE DECIDES YOU'RE TOO DUMB TO TALK TO ANY MORE, 315 DON'T TRY TO TALK THEM OUT OF QUITTING. MAYBE YOU ARE TOO DUMB. 316 IF SO, YOU COULD END UP LIKE MY DOGGIE. I OFTEN THOUGHT THAT HE 317 MIGHT BE TOO DUMB TO EXPLAIN ALL OF THIS HEAVY STUFF TO, BUT I 318 DIDN'T HAVE THE HEART TO BE HONEST WITH HIM ABOUT IT, HONEST LIKE 319 SOME PEOPLE ARE WITH ME. AND JUST LOOK WHAT HAPPENED. 320 321 I FEEL SO ASHAMED. 322 323 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!HROTHGAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 324 THIS IS ANDY, THANKS FOER THE INFO ON THE CARTOON SETS, I NEVER 325 WOULD HAVE GUESSED. JUST NOW THOUGH, I THOUGHT OF SOMETHING. 326 DID YOU EVER NOTICE HOW WHEN YOU THING~K ABOUT YOUR TOES 327 INSIDE OF YOUR SHOES THAT YOU END UP GETTING IN FRENZY TRI~YING TO GET 328 YOUR TOES OUT. IT IS LIKE THEY WERE TRAPPED AGAINST THEIR WILL IN 329 YOUR SHOES. WHY IS THIS? I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW. 330 DO YOU EVER NOTICE ALL THOSE LITTLE FUZZ BALLS ON YOUR GOOD DRESS SOCKS? 331 WHERE DO THEY COME FROM? THEY CAN'T COME FROM THE MATERIAL 332 OR THEY WOULD BE ON THE INSIDE TOO. THIS IS HARS~D FOR 333 ME TO COMPREHEND. 334 335 336 Andy Roony 337 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 338 is it just my imagination or does there seem to be a lot of garbage on this 339 board??? 340 20 341 GUYS. GUYS. GUYS. DON'T GET IN A HUFF OVER IT. THIS IS THE ONLY 342 FUN BULLITIN BOARD AROUND. ALL THE OTHER ONES HAVE ALL THOSE COMMANDS TO 343 REMEMBER AND STUFF. THIS ONE YOU CAN JUST DROP IN AND GET CRAZY. 344 I HOPE THE SYSOP READ ~S THIS TOO. AS LONG AS THE BOARD SERVES THAT 345 PURPOSE OR ANY OTHER PURPOSE IT IS WORTH WI~HILE. LETS NOT HAVE A FIT 346 ABOUT IT. JUST I~ENJOY IT FOR WHAT IT IS. 347 348 NOT CONCERNED 349 350 ************************************************************** 351 HROTHGAR: AS I REMEMBER, THE '~' IS A BACKSPACE ON THE ATARI. 352 AS PER YOUR REQUEST ALA 'REASON'. I SUBSCRIBE TO IT, SO UNLESS 353 RICH'S CAN'T GET IT FOR YOU, ABOUT ALL I COULD SUGGEST IS TO 354 SUBSCRIBE TO IT TOO. THE ADDRESS IS: REASON, 355 SAN DIEGO, CA 93103 (714) 485-xxxx. IF YOU CALL, MAYBE THEY 356 WILL SEND YOU A SAMPLE ISSUE. REASON IS A NON-PROFIT ORGINIZATION. 357 AS YOU CAN PROBABLY WELL IMAGINE THEY SPEND A RATHER LARGE 358 AMOUNT OF TIME FIGHTING WITH UNCLE TO KEEP IT AS IT SEEMS THAT 359 UNCLE DOESN'T LIKE PEOPLE TALKING ABOUT ALL THE NASTY THINGS HE'S 360 DONE AND OR IS DOING, SO HE KEEPS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT A WAY TO 361 REVOLK THE NP STATUS. AS I REMEMBER THE SUB RATE IS $15 WITH A 362 PER ISSUE COST OF $2. OH YES, IF YOU DO SUBSCRIBE YOU WILL FIND 363 YOUR NAME ON EVERY LIBITARIAN MAILING LIST IN THE COUNTRY, BUT, 364 EVEN THAT CAN BE INTERESTING AS YOU CAN GET A GOOD LOOK AT THE 365 LIBITARIAN VIEW POINT. OF COURSE GIVEN THE VARIED PAST YOU DESCRIBE, 366 I WOULDN'T BE SUPRISED IF YOUR NAME HAS FOUND ITS WAY TO ONE OF 367 THE LISTS ANYWAY, YOU SEEM TO GO FOR A LOT OF UNUSUAL READING! 368 BY THE WAY, MY FIRST EXPERIENCE WITH THE 'GOVERNMENTS VERSION 369 OF THE TRUTH' WAS WHEN I WAS IN HIGH SCHOOL WRITING A TERM PAPE 370 ON THE PUEBLO CRISIS. I USED RADIO HAVANA AS A ALTERNATE SOURCE 371 OF INFORMATION TO FIND OUT WHAT THE OTHER SIDE WAS SAYING. MY 372 TEACHER WAS IMPRESSED AND GAVE ME A B- DESPITE THAT THE PAPER 373 WAS BARELY WORTH A 'C' IN REALITY, HE GAVE ME THE EXTRA FOR 374 USING MY IMAGINATION AND EXPLORING REAL ALTERNATE POINTS OF VIEW 375 INSTEAD OF JUST GOING TO THE LIBRARY AND COPYING WHAT SOMEONE ELSE 376 WROTE. EVER SINCE THEN I'VE ALWAYS TAKEN THE 'OFFICAL WORD' WITH 377 A BIT OF SCEPTICISIM. 378 OH YES, THE '~' IS CALLED A TILDA IN CASE YOU WANTED TO KNOW. 379 *************************************************************** 380 P.S. PAM? HAVE YOU GONE SILENT ON US AGAIN? I WOULD HAVE HOPED THAT 381 YOU WOULD JOIN INTO THE FRAY! SPEAK UP! I CAN'T HEAR YOU! 382 HELLO PAM? ARE YOU THERE PAM? HELLO? HELLO? DARN, MUST HAVE HUNG UP. 383 ***************************************************************** 384 P.P.S. d. YOUR PRESENCE IS NOTED. AND ACCEPTANCE GRANTED. MUST CATCH 385 THESE TIMES ON BWMS BETWEEN OTHER WORK. 386 *******************************************************************: 387 P.P.P.S. HAVE I MISSED ANYONE ELSE? OH YES, THE STANDARD BY NOW 388 WHAT HAPPENED TO DOM? PLEA. WHERE'S DOM?? 389 ******************************************************************** 390 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 391 MR. ROONEY <You Capitalist Lackey> 392 HERE'S ANOTHER DEEP PHILOSOPHICAL QUESTION FOR YOU: 393 WHY IS THERE AIR? 394 THIS QUESTION WAS POSED BY THE FAMOUS 20th CENTURY STOIC PHILOSOPHER, 395 WILLIAM COSBY (Another Imperialist Running Dog). THAT ONE WILL KEEP 396 YOU AWAKE NIGHTS FOR A LONG TIME TO COME 397 MOHAMMED WASSIR 398 <The Albanian Firebrand> 399 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 400 401 *******************************FI GDM-NEXT MESSAGE************* 402 403 HROTHGAR: 404 405 I was flattered that you took the time to speculate about my 406 characters. You were partly correct. I do not have hundreds of 407 characters. I have only four, Grand Dragonmaster, Natasha, Big 408 Bill Broozy, and LeRoy McKane. Occassionally I'll leave an 409 unnamed message if I feel it might help the flow. 410 411 I'm glad you enjoyed Natasha and Big Bill...that seems to make 412 two of us. 413 414 LeRoy was my first character. He was the one I used to try to 415 figure out what was, and was not, appropriate for this board. 416 I retired him because he kept drawing too much flack. I guess 417 he taught me what not to do. 418 419 When I got real tired of LeRoy's bickering I introduced the 420 GRAND DRAGON MASTER as a peaceful alternative. The Grand D. is 421 my attempt to create a character that is a "gentleman". The 422 dragon master aspires to avoid nastiness and concentrate on 423 having fun. 424 425 I am hoping to find kindred spirits among the members of the 426 Inn who can share my delight in imagination. Some days are 427 more discouraging than others. 428 429 Sorry to hear about your dog. When that happened to my dog I 430 took care of it by reading to him from "China Reconstructs". 431 It worked wonders for his health but he now barks with an 432 oriental accent. 433 434 GRAND DRAGON MASTER 435 436 438 ============================== 439 440 441 442 Andy: 443 444 External sock fuzz balls are created when 445 toes, attempting to excape from shoes, scrape 446 inside sock material. The reason the balls are 447 not on the inside is because you have your socks 448 on inside-out. 449 450 451 Don't tell the Albanian Firebrand that I told 452 you this, but the answer to his question is... 453 "To blow up basket balls". 454 455 456 Grand D. 457 458 ************************************************************* 459 GDM ********************************************************* 460 Hrothgar:I have just remembered an interesting item in a letter from 461 someone living in Switzerland (member of club I belong to). They said that 462 in Switzerland, indeed in most of Europe, you must pick your child's name 463 from a list of approved names! Being Americans, they were exempt but it was 464 mentioned to them when they had their kid a few months back. Considering the 465 name they gave their kid I _almost_ agree with the approved name list idea. 466 (They named him "Kodiak Starwolf Firesmith", Firesmith being their last 467 name. Isn't that a TERRIBLE thing to saddle a kid with?) 468 ____________________________________Leonard_________________________________ 469 <<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->> 470 Greetings and salutations. I have noticed that this message 471 system can be easily described to my non-computer friends as 472 a long roll of toilet paper sitting on a table next to a 473 single pen. Every so often someone comes along, scans back along 474 the roll, and reads until the end, then writes some additional 475 comment with the pen, then returns the roll back to its resting 476 place. No significance to this comment... I just thought 477 that you might like to hear the metaphor in my mind about 478 this thing. Today is an odd-numbered day, yet I have nothing 479 profound to say. Why? Must be because I was up too late 480 last nite. So, I'll shuddup. Sorry about your dog. Dog's 481 already have zen, you don't need to give it to them. FIrst 482 mistake. (Or last, it's hard to tell.) Definitely an 483 appropriate action, to try to clap one hand above a dog. They 484 can't do it. Puts 'em into shock, it does. Then, their 485 poor little doggie mind gets blown. Oh well, so much 486 for dogs. Catch most of you later.... 487 -- Merlyn (your favorite sign-off phrase here) 488 <<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->><<-->> 489 ~~~~~Now I know a good reason for long, long, very long school years~~~~ 490 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~NO MINDLESS VACATIONERS!!!!!!~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 491 ~~~~MIKEY, MIKEY: Save us from this: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 492 ~~~~~~~~~~~DO NOT CHANGE THE DISK UNTIL EPIPHANY~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 493 THIS IS ANDY AGAIN Y~THANKS FOR THE INFO ON THE SI~OCK BALL ~A~S I CHECKED A 494 ND INDEED I DO HAVE THEM ON IN-SIDE-OUT. I HAVE THOUGHT OVER THE AIR QUESTIO 495 N AND WILL GET BACK TO YOU ON IT. 496 HAVE YOU EVER NOTIV~CED HOW THE WORDS 'THICK AND RICH' ARE OVER USED? 497 HAS ANYBODY TASTED SHAMPOO TO SEE IF IT IS RICH? I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW. 498 Andy Roony 499 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 500 MONTANA SUNSHINE 501 502 She sits upon my mantle 503 My little crystal-glass duck 504 Montana sunshine glitters 505 Iridescent rays upon her breast 506 And when she breaks wind 507 It shatters my mind 508 The Unknown Poet 509 (doing a terrible Richard Brautigan impression) 510 *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 511 Certainly an interesting metaphor, toilet paper. And it does apply to your 512 writing, Merlyn, since most of it seems to have been entered in the manner 513 that toilet paper is used. Your writing really wipes me out! 514 [(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)[(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)][(<>)] 515 AS A GRE~AT AMERICAN, DAVID LETTERMAN, WOULD SAY, 516 HARD TO BELIEVE LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, HARD TO BELE>~~IEVE. 517 HOW~~~~WHY DO PEOPLE TYPE THEN ERASE~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ALL THESE FOOL PROOF THINGS 518 HAVE ONE PROBLEM, THEY DON'T TAKE INTO ACCOUNT THE ENGINUITY OF FOOLS. 519 520 521 522 REMEN~MBER ALL YOU LAST MINUTE SHP~OPPERS, 523 NO MATE~TER HOW HARD YOU LOOK FOR SOMETHING, AND PRICE COMPARE.~, 524 IT WILL GO ON SALE SOMEWHERE AFTER YOU HAVE BOUGHT IT. 525 526 -MURPHY 527 */*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/*/* 528 HAPPY HOLIDAYS FROM ED WHALEN AND CHANNEL 6. 529 HOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHOHO 530 531 '''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''' 532 WELL WELL WELL. SINCE I HAVE FOREVER RETIRED MY ALIAS AS MERLYN AND HAVE DONATED IT TO MY FRIEND AND COMPANION I HAVE BEEN 533 SEARCHING FOR A NEW ALIAS. I HAVE FOUND ONE. YOU MAY ALL CALL ME 534 -MYRDDIN EMRYS. YOU MAY CALL ME BY BOTH OR EITHER ONE. IF YOU DO ANY RESEARCH (WHICH I DOUBT YOU'LL BOTHER) YOU MAY FIND SOM 535 THING FAIRLY INTERESTING ABOUT IT. 536 537 MERLYN- GREETS AND SALS TO YOU TOO. WILL CALL FRIDAY. IN THE MEANTIME HANG TIGHT AND STAY DRY. NO MORE TUBIN' TILL THE WEEKEND 538 (JUST A LITTLE MIND PLAY?) 539 540 ''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''''MYRDDIN EMRYS''''''''''''' 541 ''''''''''''''''''''''' 542 543 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 544 GRAND DRAGON MASTER, eh? SOUNDS LIKE A TYPICAL BOURGEOIS TITLE...ANOTHER 545 CAPITALIST CUR, GIVING AWAY ALBANIAN STATE SECRETS. 546 MOHAMMED WASSIR 547 (The Albanian Firebrand) 548 P.S. THE MEN IN THE BLACK TRENCH COATS WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR SOON, 549 BUDDY!!!! 550 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 551 552 Alex: My roommate has a Swampscott Dory. He had it made to order, so I think 553 it's the only one Schooner Creek made. We sail mostly from the boat dock at 554 48th and Marine and from Rooster Rock. No name on the boat. We also spent 555 a week sailing in the San Juans last year. Fantasic experience. If you 556 haven't tried it, I'd highly recommend it. DP 557 ****************************************************************************** 558 Well friend i~I researched your Myrddin Emrys and I think I see what you mwean. I shall promid~se to keep your secret fromm~ 559 all if that is what you wish. Your secret shall remain safe with me. 560 561 Hablu Kahn. 562 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] 563 564 HROTHGAR, YOU ARE QUITE CORRECT ABOUT THE POTENTIAL FOR EFFECT THIS 565 MEDIUM HAS, BUT I DON'T THINK THAT THIS INDIVIDUAL BBS HAS MUCH EFFECT BE- 566 YOND THE MINDS OF ITS USERS (AND IN SOME CASES, NOT EVEN THAT, AS THE NEW 567 GENERATION OF ECCENTRICS AND EGOMANIACS COMING TO THE INN DEMONSTRATES). 568 SO YOU WORKED FOR THE "UNDERGROUND" PRESS IN PORTLAND! WAS IT THE IN- 569 FAMOUS WILLAMETTE BRIDGE? I USED TO READ A NUMBER OF SUCH PUBLICATIONS 570 (SUCH AS THE BERKELEY BARB AND THE L.A. FREE PRESS) UNTIL THESE BECAME MERE 571 TRASH. THE STATE OF "ALTERNATIVE" PRESS IN AMERICA IS PITIFUL, AS MOST SUCH 572 PAPERS HAVE DISSAPEARED (THANK YOU, AGNEW!). I STILL READ MOTHER JONES, 573 THOUGH. WERE YOU A "NATTERING NABOB OF NEGATIVISM"? 574 THOMAS PAINE, EH? I WASN'T AWARE THAT ANYBODY READ HIM THESE DAYS! HE 575 IS STILL VERY RADICAL, AND I'M NOT AT ALL SURPRISED THAT HIS WRITINGS ARE SO 576 HARD TO FIND. HAVE YOU READ "COMMON SENSE" OR "ESSAYS ON THE RIGHTS OF MAN"? 577 578 POPS, THANKS FOR THE COMPLIMENTS (TWICE, EVEN!)! YES, PRAVDA CAN BE 579 VERY DULL, ESPECIALLY BY COMPARISON TO THE FLASH AND GLITTER OF AMERICAN 580 NEWS. BUT IT'S NICE TO KNOW WHAT THE OTHER GUY IS SAYING, EVEN IF YOU DON'T 581 BELIEVE A WORD OF IT OTHER PEOPLE DO, AND YOU MUST BE PREPARED IF YOU WISH 582 TO ARGUE A POINT. 583 584 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]PAM.[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] 585 ^H ? 586 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 587 *************************************************************************** 588 mickey 589 Ever wonder why people get so 590 excited over right to death issues 591 with cooker spaniels without living 592 wills. 593 Do cats have to sign nine liv- 594 ing wills to terminate heroic life 595 suppport ? Should terminally ill 596 whales be intubated and put on Bear 597 ventilators ? Should bears? 598 Should people who are full of 599 questions and empty of answers be 600 hiven national TV exposure. 601 602 ////////////////////////M.B.A.E.E./ 603 //////////////////////////////////////^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 604 ......................................EXIT 605 606 "HI HOW ARE YOU I'M HAVING A GOOD TIME " 607 ************************************************************************* 608 IT MAY VERY WELL HAVE BEEN THAT THE COMPRESS COMMAND WAS IN ACTION, OR 609 MAYBE IT WAS THE TRUNCATE COMMAND? OR POSSIBLY THE MULTIPLE DELETE? 610 IT CERTAINLY WASN'T THE COPY COMMAND, NOR COULD IT HAVE BEEN THE CLEAR 611 ALL COMMAND. IT IS DOUBTFULL THAT IT WAS THE RECOVER COMMAND, OR THE 612 INSERT COMMAND TOO. LOAD AND GO CERTAINLY WASN'T IN USE, AND PROTECT 613 COULDN'T HAVE BEEN USED. THE ERROR RECOVER AND SPEED CHANGE COMMANDS 614 COULDN'T HAVE BEEN IN USE EITHER, NOR COULD IT HAVE BEEN THE MULTIPLE 615 CHANGE OR COLUMNER CHANGE. SO THE ONLY THING IT COULD HAVE BEEN IS THE 616 COMPRESS I GUESS. HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO 617 ***************** CISTOP MIKEY ************************************* 618 P.S. SEASONS GREATINGS 619 ****************************************************************** 620 MIKEY: Your spelling is "greating" on the nerves! Repeat after me: 621 I, Mikey Day, being of willing mind and fingers, hereby resolve as 622 my one marvelous reform effort for 1984, and of course beyond, to 623 work my favorite dictionary to its very binding, and to persuade 624 my very fingers to follow the guidance thereof, until spelling 625 and typing on my own BWMS have become models for all who herein 626 venture. So help me, Digital Research! 627 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] 628 GOOD GRIEF! ONLY 3 LINES LEFT! WHAT'S A PERSON TO DO! OH WELL, NEXT DISK! 629 [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]PAM?[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]