Is there meaning beyond taking care? Beyond what life needs?

I think that our culture have built so many levels of abstraction over our primal nature that true meaning gets severely obfuscated most of the time to our understanding.

We developed the ability to create a kind of synthetic meaning that help us engage in meaningless activities that keep the status quo in good shape. That meaning creation process steals our energy to the point we cant see the true meaning of simple things. We even call them mundane.

I'v been feeling like you describe for two years now.

Today I can only find meaning into feeding kefir, baking sour dough bread, taking care of crops, hugging my family... sharing this words here.

In order to get some (still needed) money I force myself to do some meaningless work. I know it sounds sad, but knowing that is meaningless prevents me from drying my energy trying to fix stuff inside systems were everything is inherently broken.

For me, only being a house husband is really meaningful. Everything else is part of the too abstract, too broken, doomed to fail stuff we do inside the matrix bureaucrats call reality until we find better ways to shape our own reality.

I'm afraid this does not help in any convenient way to go back to normal. And I'm sorry not sorry about it. I see this existential pandemic (hearing lots of people feeling this way lately) as an opportunity to build a closer to the bone culture in which true meaning is what matters.

:wq