In my third meeting of the day with my latest new manager [1], I got some incredibly good news—I might be able to return Satan, the useless Windows Laptop [2] whose only purpose is to be continuously updated when Network Security sends me an email saying it's 20 minutes out of date and needs to be updated and get to it, chop chop! The Corporate Overlords are planning on sending a Mac laptop that can get on both the Corporate VPN (Virtual Private Network) and the Corporate Overlords' VPN (but not at the same time—that's not allowed) which obviates the need for Satan the Windows laptop. Woot!