“Hello?”
“Hello?”
“Hello‽”
“Hello there, sir. This is the Chevrolet Division of General Motors about your Chevy Impala. Do you still own it?”
“Sigh. Yes.”
“And about how many miles are on it?”
“About 40,000.”
“Our records indicate that your factory warranty has expired.”
“Yes, you and a dozen other companies call me weekly to remind me of that fact.”
“So you are aware that it's expired, good. Can we transfer you to a specialist to talk about your options?”
“Sigh. Yes.”
“Okay, hold on sir.”
“Holding on by my finger tips.”
“Hello, sir?”
“I'm still here.”
“Could you please hold?”
“Sure, I have a few minutes before my fingers lose their grip and I plummet to my death.”
“Thank you. Um … um … what? Oh … there … but … Can we call you back? I'm currently having issues dealing with this call.”
“Sigh. Okay.”
“It will only be a few minutes.”
“I'm sure it will.”
“Thank you for calling us about your warranty needs.”
“I didn't call—”
Click.