As of this writing, the new President of these United States isn't known. The initial results of Florida's general election gave Bush the state by only 2000 votes. Because this slim lead easily falls within the margin of error, the home state of Mikey Mouse and German tourist murderers is recounting the ballets – or blown out candles or colored marbles depending on the county. Whoever is declared the winner there will surely go on to claim "a clear mandate from the people". Considering the source, that mandate will likely include Geritol and cheap stool softners for all.
Funny commentary on election from a Slashdotter [1]
[1] http://slashdot.org/comments.pl?sid=00/11/08/1411247&threshold=3&commentsort=0&mode=flat&cid=781