1 upvotes, 1 direct replies (showing 1)
ALL of this just happened to me in my job, literally this past Sunday and Monday.
I work for a small business, 9 people including the 2 bosses. One boss was mostly nice, the other a complete hot head narcissist. The narc tried to slip by not paying us for some extra time. It went on for 2 weeks when I noticed it. I brought it up to both bosses, via text, on Sunday where some of us were at work working extra. The narc boss flipped out and came into work. He began to berate me in front of the 2 other women and one lady's 5 year old, telling us we should have known federal law and weren't going to be paid for it, intimidating me, wouldn't let me speak. At one point started to step towards me, his voice getting louder, until he saw the 5 year old run to him mom.
I called our state's Department of Labor Monday morning and they told me some good information. I shared it with the "good" boss and told the other workers to take screenshots of the days they worked extra and didn't get paid. Narc boss calls a team meeting Monday afternoon and telling us we'll get paid. Then looks at me and says, next time come talk to me. I spoke up and said I did, I spoke to both of you. He starts yelling over me, I'm a disruption and it's his business and he needs to make a profit. And if I was going to continue being a disruption, I should just leave.
I'm having surgery soon so on Tuesday, the day after the meeting where he bullied me, he put me on medical leave. I'm in a right to work state and there's nothing I can do. I've already talked to the Department of Labor about it. We were all working full time hours with no benefits, which is legal in our state. We were all working ourselves to exhaustion. He kept firing "troublemakers" and said he wouldn't hire more people so he could make a profit.
I see now who the troublemaker and disrupter really is. He talked shit about every previous coworker, talked super amounts of shit about customers, talked shit about his wife who left him while I was working there (he refused to let her get a job because her parents were rich and so she left him), talked shit about his own mom.
But I'm free. And I never have to go back. I'm mostly mad I didn't leave a long time ago.
As soon as you see red flags, GET OUT!
Comment by theconstellinguist at 02/02/2024 at 20:48 UTC
2 upvotes, 1 direct replies
He starts yelling over me, I'm a disruption and it's his business and he needs to make a profit. And if I was going to continue being a disruption, I should just leave.
Holy horrifying. So his way to make a profit is to literally screw his employees. Holy horrifying and disgusting. If I knew it didn't work and ends up being a narcissistic misogynist Chernobyl in the end every time, I'd say that could make anyone a communist.
He kept firing "troublemakers"
I believe the Tepper 2000 explicitly says that if your supervisor says you keeping ethical tabs on them is troublemaking, that's a hard check on their abusive supervision scale. Like it's an explicit characteristic, that exact phrase.
talked shit about his wife who left him while I was working there (he refused to let her get a job because her parents were rich and so she left him), talked shit about his own mom.
Yep, they always blame their moms. Every. Time. For why they are narcissists. It's like, did your mom force you to do that illegal thing you just did? She did not. Grow an OUNCE of responsibility. Like yes, narcissistic parents create narcissists, but if they're going to show that much self-awareness they can only explain past behavior. They can't explain current behavior. They can only do their job to deprogram now that they proved they're aware they're narcissists and aware of the causes.
The narc tried to slip by not paying us for some extra time.
Yep. Paying is reciprocity for labor given and it's also a boundary. Two things narcissists hate. **Therefore, you meet someone who over and over has problems basically paying people for basic crap, and I mean basic crap, they're a narcissist.** They're exploitative especially in the grandiose instantiation.
Yelling us we should have known federal law and weren't going to be paid for it, intimidating me, wouldn't let me speak. At one point started to step towards me, his voice getting louder,
Yep, threatening fire, holding the relationship hostage, shutting down needed counsel. And holy disgusting. "You should've known I was committing a crime against you". No, dude. You're supposed to not commit crimes ESPECIALLY when you clearly show you know it's a crime.
Again laws are just "inconvenient boundaries" in the way of their profit to these guys. Another thing narcissists hate more than paying people are laws from a democratic society.
I'm so sorry. I was nodding my head "yep" at most of this. These guys are like clockwork.
I'm thinking of doing my next write up on why narcissists hate the boundary and reciprocity of paying people.
In the meantime, read as much of this sub as you can. Armor up against these guys. Research is that armor. Analytically sound, rigorous and thorough. Three things they will never be.