3 upvotes, 1 direct replies (showing 1)
View submission: Hoping for Support
hey! first off, so much power to you. the fact that you’ve been dealing with this for two decade and have been trying everything at your disposal says a lot about you and your character. it also means you shouldnt beat yourself up about the relapses, you working on it in itself is a huge success, you posting here is also a huge success, and it’s nice to hear you can identify support systems like your husband.
i know for me i can’t go more than 2-3 days without pulling, and it takes a lot of energy. but even if it’s half a day or a couple hours that you aren’t pulling, seriously, hype yourself up because it is not easy at all. even when i relapse i just think about how far i’ve come, so be really gentle with yourself and make a big deal out of all the steps of progress no matter how small. because every minute or second you aren’t pulling is you being good to yourself, and that’s something to be really proud of.
for me right now i’m trying to figure out when i pull the most and try those substitution things. so for example i pull a lot when i’m studying or in class, so instead i snap a ton of rubber bands. i have these thick brittle ones so honestly it kind of mimics the feeling of what i would feel when i pull hair. it also makes my hands nimble which is usually when i stop pulling. i also know that i pull a lot and also pick my skin on my feet when i get out of the shower, so i’ll immediately put socks on or even shoes and try to be busy myself with something else. going on walks or runs even when you start to feel it is good too, i find it helps. i also know i pull a lot in bed before heading to sleep and watching tv or reading, so i try to think of an activity to do instead that i enjoy because the thing is i also love pulling so i gotta do something else i love to compensate. so i’ll do art, crochet, paint my nails, do a puzzle, anything.
i’m wishing you lots of good luck, and if you pull tomorrow, then you pull tomorrow, and then you try again another day. it also might help to not think of it so much like sobriety and more like reduction, so if you pulled for a couple hours, try ten minutes less, or 20 minutes less. good will come, you are so strong and i’m sending you lots of warm thoughts and good vibes🌟❤️
Comment by margotiii at 16/10/2020 at 01:40 UTC
2 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Thank you so much for this kind and thoughtful reply. Like most people with Trich, I really struggle to be kind to myself and I beat myself up a lot. It’s crazy that a stranger on the internet can be nicer to me than I am to myself and it’s a good reminder to be more gentle with myself.
How has your pulling been going? Is there any one thing you��ve found that helps you the most? Message me any time for support if you’re having a rough day.
You really have no idea how much these kind words and optimism mean to me right now. Thank you.