created by NotACaterpillar on 24/02/2025 at 08:57 UTC
13 upvotes, 15 top-level comments (showing 15)
Hello everyone. When I accepted my job last year, it was a 4,5h commute roundtrip. This was doable, it was a direct train, but in autumn last year they started doing construction along the line so now part way through we have to switch to a bus. This adds quite a bit of time to my commute, so now I'm doing 5-6h commute every day. I wake up at 7:05am, leave at 7:25, and I'm back home (if all goes well) by 21:30.
This gives me about 1h of free time at home in the evenings. During that time I cook dinner + lunch for the next day, eat said dinner, spend some time with family, and then I go to sleep. I try hard to sleep 8h every night but realistically it's closer to 7h actual sleep. I spend most of the weekend in bed.
Sometimes I have to eat out or get a premade lunch from the supermarket, but I generally eat quite healthy. I walk 8-12k steps every day. I go to the gym during lunch break but lately have been feeling so tired that I can barely do any exercise. My job is not difficult per se but it is very attention demanding so mentally taxing: I have too much work, short timeframes to complete tasks, truly constant interruptions (like every few minutes, sometimes several times a minute), I am also training a new person. I have talked to my bosses about having too much work and also potentially working from home some days but no such luck.
I do plan to quit early next year. For reasons it would not be so good to quit before then. But what changes can I make to improve my life before then? Recently I bought some noise cancelling headphones and they've been a game changer. Still, I am feeling simply exhausted.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
Comment by Foreign_End_3065 at 24/02/2025 at 14:28 UTC
22 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Can you stay overnight at least once a week in a budget hotel?
Comment by ACuriousFish at 24/02/2025 at 14:52 UTC
39 upvotes, 1 direct replies
That is an insane commute. Definitely sounds unsustainable. Seems like you need to move closer, go hybrid/remote or find alternative employment.
Comment by Lbstanford at 24/02/2025 at 14:29 UTC
13 upvotes, 0 direct replies
If home office / quit isn't a option right now, can you sleep on your lunch time? I mean, gym is important, but to me it looks like you need to rest
Comment by DanteJazz at 24/02/2025 at 14:41 UTC
14 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Rent a room from someone either nightly or 3 nights/week?
Comment by hotflashinthepan at 24/02/2025 at 15:12 UTC
7 upvotes, 0 direct replies
How are you spending all those hours on your commute? If nothing else can change right now, maybe that is where you can figure out some way to start recovering. (Especially if you are able to sit, and not stand.)
Comment by kss51116 at 24/02/2025 at 15:19 UTC
6 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Maybe you could consider eating dinner on your way home so it’s one less thing to do when you get home but that would mean packing something suitable and not antisocial eg a sandwich. Agree with the others that this is super unsustainable though.
Comment by lookfullness at 24/02/2025 at 15:22 UTC
4 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Could you maybe get a little bit of sleep on the train or bus? I'm thinking if your job requires a lot of attention, maybe the train and bus ride would be a good time to just kinda stare out the window as well and let your mind wander. I notice that sometimes after work I can't process things like podcasts or videos well because my brain is tired. I find listening to music more resting when that happens. Or sometimes I will just sit in silence on my way home and give my brain a break that way.
Comment by SellGameRent at 24/02/2025 at 22:55 UTC
5 upvotes, 1 direct replies
No one will convince me that a 4.5hr commute is compatible with simple living lol
Comment by mummymunt at 24/02/2025 at 22:21 UTC
2 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Yeah, that's not sustainable at all. You need to live closer to work or find a job closer to home.
Comment by WastingTimesOnReddit at 25/02/2025 at 05:51 UTC
2 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I would rather die than spend that much time commuting. But I don't want to die, so I would either A) get new job, or B) move to live closer to work. Change one of the locations.
Comment by Foreign_End_3065 at 25/02/2025 at 08:14 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Take your holiday allowance week by week. So start to use it so you only work a 4-day week, giving you an extra weekend day.
If your boss doesn’t like that, explain that not being able to work from home 1 day a week is making you ill with exhaustion, so this is your solution so that you don’t go off sick.
Comment by Teee_dollar at 25/02/2025 at 11:53 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
It might help to try mindful breathing or meditation during your commute to ease stress. Even a few minutes of relaxation can recharge you mentally.
Comment by bkendig at 24/02/2025 at 17:01 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Is your commute active (driving a car, or walking) or passive (riding a bus or a train)? You mentioned a bus, so that's at least part of it.
If you're riding for most of your commute, you could read or listen to music or audiobooks or watch TED talks or instructional videos to learn new skills to better yourself. You could catch up on movies or TV series you've always been wanting to see. You could write (fiction or nonfiction, even just a daily journal). You could draw, and get good at drawing. There's a variety of ways you could pass the time that, by next year, you could look back on and say you accomplished something with it. You could even nap.
But if you're having to drive and focus on the road for hours every day on your commute - that's hardly worth it. That takes a lot out of you and gives you little mental space to reclaim yourself.
Comment by LetterToAThief at 25/02/2025 at 16:49 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
That’s completely unmanageable. You’re commuting almost as long as you’re working. You have one option and it’s find a new job ASAP
Comment by AutoModerator at 24/02/2025 at 08:57 UTC
0 upvotes, 0 direct replies
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