https://www.reddit.com/r/simpleliving/comments/1ivx6mu/travel_not_for_me_anymore/
created by Wagon789 on 23/02/2025 at 00:17 UTC
271 upvotes, 37 top-level comments (showing 25)
Before kids I had this bucket list of travelling and sights to see, foods to try, museums and galleries to visit, hikes to go on, cocktails to have at whichever bar was on trend, beautiful shopping malls to visit, places of culture to visit etc.
I did half of these before kids, left some family friendly ones for ones later. Now with kids when we travel it’s not for me anymore. Disorganisation, crowds, extreme weather especially wind and humidity scares me, worried about losing things, worried about sickness.
Now during my holidays, I am happy for a picnic in a beautiful park, book to read, relax in a cafe that’s different to my normal ones, walks at the beach, spend time tending to my garden and enjoy watching kids play sport. I don’t have this joy of travelling anymore, trust me I have gone on about 10 holidays with the kids thinking it will get better but it doesn’t. That thrill and joy has now turned into the happiness that is my area I live in and turning day trips into my holidays. We go to food markets, different gardens, sometimes an art exhibit locally or a local hike somewhere.
Has life after kids changed the way you feel about simple living and travel?? Is it just me or my sensory needs have now changed post kids. Some people say same crap different location when it comes to travelling, but I feel that it’s just so much work and not much joy with travelling now, I feel post covid it’s so much worse too.
Comment by robotjyanai at 23/02/2025 at 01:45 UTC
80 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I used to enjoy traveling but not anymore. Thanks to social media almost everywhere in my country other than my neighborhood is crowded. Can’t afford to go abroad.
But it’s okay, I’m learning to love the small things and can save money, too. I kind of feel sorry for people traveling now who base their trip off of overhyped social media recommendations. There’s no sense of adventure anymore.
Comment by skyemap at 23/02/2025 at 10:44 UTC
43 upvotes, 2 direct replies
I've never enjoyed travel. I feel guilty admitting this because people make it seem like it's the best thing ever and soul enriching and how could you possibly not like it, but I hate almost everything about it. I hate touristy stuff, I hate how tiring traveling is, I hate the rush of having to be on the go all the time to maximize the time of your trip. I hate sleeping in an unfamiliar bed.
I do enjoy, however, spending a few months actually living in a different country. That's very fun, especially if it's with some kind of program that helps you have activities to actually experience living the culture of the country, for example, an exchange
Comment by Entire_Dog_5874 at 23/02/2025 at 00:38 UTC
125 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Agree. I loved to travel before Covid hit and visited many countries around the world, but it’s all become too much. People are uncooperative, nasty, disrespectful, and aggressive so I’d rather stay home and enjoy things in my local area.
Comment by Skadforlife2 at 23/02/2025 at 05:26 UTC
18 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Traveling for work has 100% put me off traveling for pleasure. Now, I just want to stay home.
Comment by hestias-leftsandal at 23/02/2025 at 00:59 UTC
30 upvotes, 1 direct replies
For me I’ve realized most of my stress is about tending my toddler- so I expect that once kids are grown or out of the house I’ll like traveling again. I like being new places, but I don’t like the massive stresses that seem to come with small children in new places- bathroom emergencies, laying down to lick the floor, odd critters that I don’t know if they’re safe, etc. it will be fun again in another season of life
Comment by junesix at 23/02/2025 at 04:42 UTC
11 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I used to wonder why people would take a weeklong trip to Hawaii or Mexico or Bahamas, rent a place, and not do any sightseeing, shopping, or eating out all week. Just sit at the pool and get room service or eat at nearest restaurant.
And then we had a kid. And it all made sense.
Comment by Rosaluxlux at 23/02/2025 at 01:12 UTC
10 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I think it just changes depending what you do in your daily life. Kids bring in plenty of novelty and, like you said, plenty of sensory overwhelm. So you want something else from your holidays. And the extra work of traveling with them and doing things they like instead of just whatever you want takes away from the pleasure. I did find that for a long time I enjoyed camping with my kid - it wasn't much extra work and he was happy doing the activities I like (light hiking, hanging out in hammocks, playing cards, riding bikes). But for visiting new cities he was a lot of extra work and didn't enjoy a lot of things (museums, nice restaurants, long walks on sidewalks, taking to strange adults) that I like, so we did them less after all the extra work of getting there.
Comment by Historical_Pair3057 at 23/02/2025 at 00:25 UTC
33 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Same. I used to love to travel and traveled a lot with my kids. But my partner came to really not like the whole hassel of it and so I traveled with my kids and other families (friends or relatives) and we got to go to places that I liked which were basically nature places (my partner wasn't a huge nature fan). And once I started traveling to far away places to hike mountains or swim in beaches, I realized how stupid travel can be because I can probably drive a few hours and find that stuff much closer.
Anyhoo, I do still feel like travel is wonderful and worthy, I just don't think it's for me right now.
Comment by Proof-Calligrapher15 at 23/02/2025 at 07:43 UTC
10 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I don't have kids, but I felt the same. In my 20's I used to love traveling so much and had my own share of incredible travel experiences but now that I am in my 30's I'm becoming more of a homebody and I find myself enjoying more things that you mentioned: reading books, take care of my garden, listening to music, and spend time with my family and pets. I'm just in a different phase of my life, and I welcome it. :)
Comment by -jspace- at 23/02/2025 at 00:44 UTC
18 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I have to say I'm lucky to live where we have amazing things to do within an hour so it's convenient to adventure and not have to travel.. I'm not about the vibe in airports anymore. I more than ever want my accommodations made ahead of travel whereas before I would just kinda wing a lot of things and that was part of the fun. And yeah illness is everywhere and no one will mask or stay home so it's extra jerk vibes. I have also found that either I'm really wanting my kid to super get something out of the adventure and I'm sad if they don't seem to care, or it feels like I'm missing out on fun stuff doing the parenting part of having a kid on vacation. We do evolve as people as we age, and I think the juice needs to be worth the squeeze since we have less squeeze in us.
Comment by NoGrocery3582 at 23/02/2025 at 01:57 UTC
18 upvotes, 0 direct replies
We traveled regularly and widely before COVID. Now with a fraught political climate at home, unruly people on planes and air born illness running rampant we're not ready.
Comment by Reddish81 at 23/02/2025 at 09:57 UTC
9 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I’m so glad I did most of my travelling pre-Covid. The pandemic appears to have unleashed a beast. I’m childfree and love my freedom but even my travel urges have reduced these days and I also love being in my own locale.
Comment by BluebirdNeat7754 at 23/02/2025 at 00:34 UTC
15 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I travelled a lot when I was a kid that when I became an adult (before kids) I didn’t really care to travel much. I cared more about exploring the country and city in which I lived. Basically exploring your own backyard.
I have 4 kids now and I enjoy having new fun experiences with my children the same way. Hopping on a plane just to go to a beach seems like such a hassle when we could drive an hour or so away and go to beach close to us.
We live in Ontario, Canada and there are so many beautiful places around us.
Comment by Mia_Thompson612 at 23/02/2025 at 03:17 UTC
5 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I totally get this. Travel feels so different after kids. I feel you. It’s more about making sure they’re happy and safe than actually relaxing. I think finding joy in simple things close to home is just as special, and honestly, way less stressful.
Comment by Bird_on_a_hippo at 23/02/2025 at 03:26 UTC
8 upvotes, 1 direct replies
My husband and I don’t have kids, but we have been enjoying our time off in the same ways you describe. I love day trips, and just walking to a new cafe or different part of the city I’m in.
Plane travel stresses me out. I have tiny ear canals so descent is always a bit painful, and I’m paranoid about getting sick, and I just don’t like being squished up next to a bunch of strangers. And most of all, I want to support our beautiful planet and not do more needless damage.
Comment by Antique-Emu3223 at 23/02/2025 at 08:25 UTC
6 upvotes, 1 direct replies
At first you travel because of FOMO, but then you realize it isn’t all that great somewhere else either.
Comment by elsielacie at 23/02/2025 at 02:55 UTC
6 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I enjoyed travel before I had kids but it wasn’t something I felt I couldn’t live without.
Now I have kids I’m meh on the idea. I think you also have to be considerate of the temperament and preferences of your kids. My kids are at an age where they still need a lot of support with their emotional regulation and doing that in a travel environment is exhausting because they also find new environments deregulating. It’s not a holiday. I’m sure there would be some great experiences peppered into the hard work but probably not enough to justify putting us all through that before we master emotional regulation in slower paced and more familiar environments. Some kids travel like a dream though so as with all things kid: YMMV.
We do go camping. Basically pitch a tent next to the ocean and don’t leave for two weeks except to walk to the shops 300m away.
Comment by Sniggy_Wote at 23/02/2025 at 18:28 UTC
6 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Definitely travel is less interesting to me than it used to be. It’s a lot of money and a lot of planning and every place is crowded. My “bucket list” now is far smaller than I thought it would be at this age. There just aren’t nearly as many places that are worth the time, money and energy when relaxing at home is also a good option.
Comment by Jimbaroome at 23/02/2025 at 01:02 UTC
6 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Can so relate to this. Planning and preparing for travels with kids have become so stressful, and it’s all about activities for the kids/ family. I do occasionally fantasise about travelling by myself without the kids. But who am I kidding, I will probably miss them so much that I won’t enjoy the trip too.
Comment by Atiran at 23/02/2025 at 02:35 UTC
9 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I became so much more content after I had children. I couldn’t care less about seeing the world.
Comment by mickdaquinn at 23/02/2025 at 23:14 UTC
4 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I also have put the whole travel thing behind me, been to many different places around the world, I just came to the conclusion that the need to travel has been created by the travel industry, Via movies, tv shows, magazines, YouTube channels, & sm , never mind direct advertising, it’s tiring congested, bad for the environment, and the opposite of simple Lifestyle, I just feel like a sucker every time a go on a destination vacation, been used by many layers of the travel industry.
Comment by Isostasty at 24/02/2025 at 02:01 UTC
4 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I don't have kids but I totally get it. I love seeing new places but I hate the logistics of it and how expensive it's gotten.
I've changed the way I traveled so I'm in one spot for a couple of weeks. Slow travel is more for me and I mostly do it now because I live in the southwest and it's depressing to stay here with 110 weather for summer.
Comment by hereforthefreedrinks at 24/02/2025 at 02:59 UTC
4 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I love to travel but with my 11 month old, I rarely even leave my neighborhood lol. I am looking forward to traveling with him when he’s a bit older. I have a lot of fondness for core memories of travel from my own childhood.
Right now though I’m honestly scared to travel with the chaos in the government.
Comment by DrowsyQuokka at 23/02/2025 at 03:34 UTC
3 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I felt like that when the kids were younger. We would be asked to go visit family overseas- a 22 hour plane trip and a huge time zone change. With everything going on, I simply did not have the bandwidth to deal with my schedule-oriented kids in a new environment where the culture, rules and schedules were different.
We didn’t travel for a while, but now that the kids are older, travel is enjoyable again. The kids don’t need strollers, car seats. They can carry their own backpacks and self advocate for themselves. Luckily, they also enjoy museums, farmers markets and good restaurants now too.
I would say that our travel decisions and activities now are more intentional and focused on what we (as a family enjoy) rather than what is trendy and expected-. For example, we may choose to stay in a quieter, less touristy area. Going to a museum instead of the latest and greatest shopping mall.
We’ve also started prioritizing activities and accepting that some will need to be put off until the next visit.
Comment by HumbleGaijin at 23/02/2025 at 14:37 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Changing as a person is okay. You're allowed to pivot your desires to align with a life change.
I will say that you should temper it. The children will leave the nest and if being a parent is all you allow yourself to be, you'll be wandering the desert.
Have fun. Leave a line in the water in case you wish to do these things again in the future.