1 upvotes, 1 direct replies (showing 1)
View submission: Monthly Progress Thread - November '24
amazing, and congrats. Would love to hear more, since I have sensitivity issues where it matter most, but I am a penis wielder, so it's probably irrelevant for me)
Comment by Soft-Competition-740 at 12/11/2024 at 19:28 UTC
9 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Not to go too in-depth about my sexual history, but I do think a bit of it is relevant... When I was in middle school, I was going through puberty and found it pretty easy to get aroused (though never orgasmed as far as I can recall). Then an unfortunate incident happened to me in middle school that pretty much completely turned me off of sex and caused intense sexual repression (not abuse or anything, but it caused some very lasting repercussions that basically caused me to shut down sexually). The first time I orgasmed was when I was 18 or 19, as far as I recall.
In terms of sexual sensation, I found that sex wasn't necessarily the most pleasurable--orgasming felt good, but also my clitoris was extremely sensitive to the point where I often shied away from direct touch to the area. I more liked being touched to the side of the clit, on the other side of the hood or labia, so veryyyyy indirect touch. Orgasm also could feel almost painful sometimes--like a very sudden and intense shot of pleasure, where before orgasming there hadn't been much intense sexual sensation. I also frequently experienced orgasm without much sensation via my G-spot, where I could tell I was coming, but didn't feel much. The thing is that I loved having sex with my husband! It felt like my body knew what to do, but nevertheless I didn't get much physical sensation. All in all, pretty confusing, but I still had a good time.
Now back to TRE. I realize now that I was starting to feel some of the sensation changes 2ish years ago when I started TRE, but didn't recognize that they were related to my TRE practice. That manifested as a somewhat pleasurable sensation when my lower back was stroked/touched during sex, in the "dimples of Venus" area.
Around two months ago, my TRE movements suddenly grew more sexual--back arches, muscle spasms in the vaginal area, etc. It was like the physical movements of an orgasm, without much sensation.
Then, in the day or so after a TRE session, I began to feel a feeling of coolness (as opposed to heat) in various parts of my body. The coolness was also sometimes accompanied by a sort of itch, as if many of my nerves were starting to come alive. This sensation was frequently in my vaginal area, psoas, lower back, or stomach and would sort of slide around. Also toward the back of my mouth, like I mentioned in my other reply. I also felt a sort of deep muscular sensation (kind of like DOMS?) in my hip flexor area, which I imagine was the psoas muscle relaxing after years of being in a different, guarded position. I also had a few days where I was suddenly intensely horny, like I had never been in my life before. Over the course of several weeks, through TRE practice, yoga/deep stretching, time for integration, and a few edibles, the way that I experienced sexual sensation profoundly and seemingly permanently changed. I no longer guard my clitoris, but rather find that it's most pleasurable to be touched there directly. The stance in which I orgasm has changed, from previously always wanting my knees up (in a guarded position), to rather having my legs flat on the ground (so that my hip flexor muscles are as relaxed as possible). That is something that I discovered quickly... the more my hip flexors are relaxed, the easier it is for me to experience a pleasurable orgasm. Also, the closer I get to orgasm, the more straight and close together my legs get. That's 100% different than it used to be.
The most amazing thing that has happened so far on this journey was when I was having sex with my husband and felt more of my nerves come to life while riding him. It was like someone switched on a lightbulb halfway through--this was what sex had been supposed to feel like all along. Incredible.
Here is what I believe has happened, based on the sensations that I've felt. Bear in mind that I'm not schooled in anatomy or physiology, so just reporting my own experience. I think that for pretty much the whole time I've been a sexual being, that my pelvic muscles have been in a guarded position, very likely due to the unfortunate incident that happened to me in middle school. It feels like some nerves in the vaginal region were blocked, leading to me having too much sensation in the clit (in an unpleasurable way) and not enough sensation in other parts of my body. Like a firehose of nerve sensations being funneled towards the clit, because that was the only place they could physically go, all the while depriving the rest of my body of sexual sensation. That was how I felt before.
And now it feels like those nerve blockages are in the process of being lifted. Touching the clit is now MORE pleasurable because there is less funneled sensation there, and the rest of my body is now also finally experiencing more pleasure. While having sex, I also often feel a great deal of pleasure when that dimples of Venus area is stroked.
In practicing TRE, I still continue to experience that coolness/itchiness feeling in varying degrees--it will usually come in waves one or two days after a TRE session and then subside over the course of a few more days. I usually feel it when I'm sitting in a chair or lying down--that is to say, when my pelvic area is relaxed because I'm not holding myself upright. Once that coolness/itchiness sensation goes away, then I know to do TRE again, and rinse and repeat. I strongly suspect that the coolness/itchiness feeling is my nerves awakening and coming back into a healthier state.
Now when I do TRE, the tremors have lately been moving through my whole body. They have moved up to my shoulders, neck, head, face, some arms/hands, and also down to my lower legs, toes, etc. These days, I never know what area will be tremoring; it can be very random.
I'm very curious to know what the future holds for me with TRE. As I said in my other comment, I started dabbling with TRE just because I was looking for solutions for my husband, not because I myself am a deeply traumatized person. So I don't know when this journey will "end," so to speak--when will all my nerves be functioning normally again and back online, so to speak? All I can say is that it has been an extremely positive practice for me so far and sometimes it truly does feel like magic.