https://i.redd.it/ozh7g9bnyni81.jpg
created by erlend_nikulausson on 18/02/2022 at 21:58 UTC
1378 upvotes, 73 top-level comments (showing 25)
Comment by bykatvchdcom at 18/02/2022 at 22:03 UTC
605 upvotes, 6 direct replies
The teacher put in so much effort while grading this paper even though this is clearly non-passing student, props.
Comment by AlabamaNerd at 18/02/2022 at 23:33 UTC
276 upvotes, 2 direct replies
Man, that guy put like 0 effort into that paper.
That teacher put more effort into grading it. Go professor.
Comment by obscurereference234 at 18/02/2022 at 22:16 UTC
129 upvotes, 3 direct replies
I like how there was one part in the middle of all that craziness that the teacher was “Fine” with. 😂
Comment by Reason_Training at 18/02/2022 at 23:59 UTC
228 upvotes, 5 direct replies
Which my philosophy teacher was like this. She was ancient and should have been retired years ago. Never marked the papers beyond the opening/closing paragraphs so finally I tested it and wrote the beginning / closing paragraphs about Heart of Darkness that we were studying that week then the rest was a summary of Army of Darkness the movie. Got an A so the rest of the semester was spent writing great opening / closing paragraphs and a movie summary for filler between. Ended the semester with an A and learned nothing in that class.
Comment by HalforcFullLover at 18/02/2022 at 22:27 UTC
31 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Never should have left.
Comment by jhill515 at 19/02/2022 at 00:05 UTC
79 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Kinda wish I could read the whole paper. The student did put some effort into the manuscript, though obviously let having fun get in the way of serious business.
Still, he raises several interesting points: How meaningful is the risk to Mario's well-being if he habitually exchanges 100 coins for another life? Failure no longer carries consequence, thus if he tried hard enough, he could live-die-repeat until he figured out the optimal diplomatic tactic. Yet the character habitually engages in violence in the name of self-preservation despite the acknowledged invulnerability he possesses. Quite the ethical dilemma.
Perchance.
Comment by b0xcard at 18/02/2022 at 22:00 UTC
71 upvotes, 2 direct replies
Not all geniuses are appreciated in their time. You know, Einstein didn't even make varsity for his high school basketball team.
Comment by zjustice11 at 18/02/2022 at 22:36 UTC
35 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Perchance? Perchance.
Comment by dysenigrate at 19/02/2022 at 00:57 UTC
21 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Counterpoint - stay in and try to learn something, anything. That hurt to read. Perchance.
Comment by NorthSuperior at 18/02/2022 at 22:57 UTC
28 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I disagree about the opening. I was hooked.
Comment by Gabe326 at 19/02/2022 at 01:18 UTC
10 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Crushing turts all day 🤘
Comment by SomeNotTakenName at 19/02/2022 at 03:11 UTC
10 upvotes, 2 direct replies
I mean the paper is just not good, at least for college english 101 level writing.
Comment by sleephess at 18/02/2022 at 23:49 UTC
8 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I like where this paper is going. I'd love to see the idea fleshed out some more. I also love the idea that Mario can't get enough "crushing turtles". I'm sure I'm missing the hidden meaning behind "crushing turtles", but just finding the literal meaning hilarious. Let's see if you can't get that grade up to a solid C.
Comment by Warloxd at 19/02/2022 at 00:10 UTC
13 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Oh my god, Phil, you can't just say "perchance".
Comment by erlend_nikulausson at 18/02/2022 at 21:59 UTC
12 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Comment by Sir_Alien at 18/02/2022 at 22:46 UTC
13 upvotes, 0 direct replies
This feels about as real as Mario himself.
Comment by thisbobo at 18/02/2022 at 22:39 UTC
11 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I would perchance like to read the rest of this.
Comment by Ok-Power-6064 at 18/02/2022 at 23:28 UTC
12 upvotes, 2 direct replies
I wouldn't be surprised if this is real. My college roommate wrote a paper for his film critique class that talked about how great Killer Klowns from Outer Space was, and the opening paragraph compared it to the "petals of a beautiful flower."
Comment by shane_v04 at 18/02/2022 at 22:54 UTC
5 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Least he indented his paragraph
Comment by Val-the-Crow-King at 19/02/2022 at 02:32 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I love how his first sentence has the word fuck. It's even better when he's comparing a mythical plumber with "unlimited lives" to the 1%er rich elites.
Comment by Moritasgus2 at 19/02/2022 at 06:38 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Such as the Iraq and such as
Comment by dufflebagoshit at 18/02/2022 at 23:51 UTC
9 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I’m calling BS. All these corrections but no mention about how he started a sentence with the word and??
Comment by BiggieWedge at 19/02/2022 at 00:09 UTC
6 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I'm a little confused about what the thesis of this paper is. I assumed it was that bit about Dr. Pepper but the visible paragraphs don't seem to address myths at all.
I'd have to see the whole thing to really judge though.
Comment by kansas_slim at 19/02/2022 at 00:21 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I wrote entire college essay on a shit I took. Got a C and the teacher seemed like she thought that grade was a punishment…
Comment by properu at 19/02/2022 at 00:25 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Beep boop -- this looks like a screenshot of a tweet! Let me grab a link to the tweet[1] for ya :)
1: https://twitter.com/PhilJamesson/status/1494724904129859588
^(Twitter Screenshot Bot)
