https://www.reddit.com/r/AskWomen/comments/1i8ld7k/women_without_partnersstrong_family_ties_how_did/
created by Psychological_Bed_83 on 24/01/2025 at 02:44 UTC
109 upvotes, 34 top-level comments (showing 25)
title
Comment by jahoefs at 24/01/2025 at 02:59 UTC
151 upvotes, 2 direct replies
I picked a city on the map that fit my budget and wants. Ended up closeish (30 min) to the ocean with a reasonable mortgage. My job is in demand and flexible (healthcare) so that helped. I ended up making great friends and meeting my fiancé so it worked out great for me
Comment by Dr__Pheonx at 24/01/2025 at 03:16 UTC
70 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I keep moving. Going wherever the job and pay is good. But I hope to stay at my current city depending on if I get the job in the long run...which only time will tell.
Comment by Busy-Claim6797 at 24/01/2025 at 03:51 UTC
29 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I applied to every big city with jobs.
Chicago hired me first. Moved there 5 years ago. Love it. Best city on earth.
Comment by GrumpyPanda29 at 24/01/2025 at 03:13 UTC
29 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I went where the quality of life was better.
Comment by AproposofNothing35 at 24/01/2025 at 03:12 UTC
33 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Weather and job market. I live in the Bay Area.
Comment by marxam0d at 24/01/2025 at 03:28 UTC
10 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Two times it was picking a school (university then grad school), two times it was taking jobs. Different cities, states and countries
Comment by sourdo at 24/01/2025 at 04:39 UTC
10 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I don't have a car so the location was huge. I have a 20min. walk to my 1st job and a 30min. $2.50 bus ride to my second. Plus, grocery, shopping, library, etc. all w/n a 30min. walk from me depending on which direction I walk.
2nd huge factor was no roommates. I was willing to budge on cost a bit to afford a place by myself. I was successful at doing such at a cost that was only $100 over but I make over 3x the rent anyways so ehh.
Finding this place was huge for me. It has changed my whole life around. I was living in this creepy house before that was destroying my sanity. Now, I am free to be myself without anyone saying shit or telling me what they want to do or watch or cook or eat. I get to decide if I go out. I decide when and what I eat. This has led me to lead a healthier lifestyle. I cook more and I keep the space clean. Its enough space for me to manage a cleaning schedule and also small enough to keep me from buying unnecessary things.
Comment by tinysandcastles at 24/01/2025 at 04:14 UTC
9 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Picked a place where people in my profession (teaching) have strong unions and good pay. Also picked a place with mountains cause I’ve always liked the vibes of mountain communities, they feel close knit or something
Comment by Kittysprinkle_ at 24/01/2025 at 03:28 UTC
27 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I google the sexual predator percentage in the town I’m looking for and if it’s not low enough, I find somewhere else.
Comment by BooksandStarsNerd at 24/01/2025 at 04:32 UTC
13 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I looked at small towns that wouldn't break my budget. Primarily, I looked at:
I now live in a $650 2 bedroom apartment in a stupidly small town in Montana
Took me 2 moves to find a perfect fit, though. So if move #1 doesn't work well, try again.
Also, as an ex military wife, avoid areas around bases. They tend to have a lot of issues safety and otherwise.
Comment by lawanddisorderr at 24/01/2025 at 03:32 UTC
4 upvotes, 0 direct replies
School/work led me places. I stayed for low cost of living and the friendships I made. I will consider moving again though when I can comfortably afford to live somewhere more peaceful, which for me just means closer to the ocean.
Comment by Glittering_South5178 at 24/01/2025 at 04:25 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Job market. Jobs in my field are scarce and you don’t have much of a say in where you end up.
Comment by NonsensicalNiftiness at 24/01/2025 at 06:15 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I wanted somewhere where it rains, is green, and is liberal, so I moved to Western Washington.
Comment by letsgetridiculus at 24/01/2025 at 04:52 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I travelled until I didn’t want to leave where I was. I knew I didn’t want to stay in my home town but I didn’t know what I wanted, so I just said yes to travel opportunities when they came up and one day I didn’t want to any more! Now I’ve been in a tiny mountain town in Canada for 10 years and I’m very happy.
Comment by kingfisher345 at 24/01/2025 at 04:47 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Good question. I chose where I feel most at home, which is London (my profession is also here which helps) and chose an area I can afford, which is South.
Comment by Upstairs_Meringue_18 at 24/01/2025 at 05:14 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I chose the most expensive but beautiful area to live in
I don't save as much as I did in a small town where it always snowed. But I'm so much happier. I was dating at the time. And partner couldn't imagine starting a family in this exp area. So now that I'm single I can.
And que sera sera the future
Comment by artsy_hobo at 24/01/2025 at 08:49 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Interesting prompt. I'm afraid this doesn't really apply to me as I live with my family, but this isn't something I've pondered often.
Comment by No_Extent_6716 at 24/01/2025 at 09:53 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I followed my dreams, I love my family but it’s broken and I come from a 3rd world country so it was not hard for me to leave, I always wanted to learn French so I moved to France, it was not easy but I’ve been living here for three years and it was the best decision ever!
Comment by briana28019 at 24/01/2025 at 22:19 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I picked a city that I enjoy visiting and has a lot of stuff I want to do. Plus there’s an international airport with a lot of direct flights for traveling.
Comment by [deleted] at 24/01/2025 at 03:56 UTC
1 upvotes, 1 direct replies
[removed]
Comment by Madamschie at 24/01/2025 at 08:29 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
job and distance to it. Now several years and many friendships later i dont want to go too far away again because of these friends.
Comment by CV2nm at 24/01/2025 at 08:33 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Im currently in a big city but I dream of the beach. The beach is where I plan to go next.
It's kinda nice (but lonely) knowing that home is essentially wherever you call it.
Comment by rachaeltalcott at 24/01/2025 at 09:32 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
When I was younger and still working, I moved to where the jobs were. Now that I'm retired, I picked my city based on visiting once and loving it.
Comment by GladiusCorvus at 24/01/2025 at 09:54 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Honestly, I just went with the vibe. Where I felt happy and free, ya know? No partner or fam, just me deciding what feels right.
Comment by chickpeaze at 24/01/2025 at 12:21 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I picked a place that was beautiful, small, and supported most of my outdoorsy hobbies