1518 upvotes, 68 direct replies (showing 25)
View submission: What's something you never understood about the opposite gender?
How some men (maybe just the ones I’ve ever met) can’t find something when it’s in front of their eyes. “I’ve looked everywhere for my shirt”, what the one that’s in front of you right there?
Comment by chili052 at 08/03/2025 at 19:34 UTC
350 upvotes, 10 direct replies
I read on here once sometimes you have to look with your hands and I use that now all the time when my son says he can’t find something. It helps him a ton to remember to move things around to look!
Comment by heatfan10 at 08/03/2025 at 18:44 UTC
351 upvotes, 14 direct replies
For me, it has to do with my mind only considering logical places for it to be. So where would I have put that thing? If it’s not in one of those places, I’m blind to it. Almost every time this happens, it’s because someone else moved it to a place I never would have.
I’m not saying this is a good way of thinking, it’s just how my brain works.
Comment by though- at 08/03/2025 at 21:05 UTC
31 upvotes, 2 direct replies
Hey, as a woman, this happens to me all the time. This transcends genders.
Comment by BotiaDario at 08/03/2025 at 21:52 UTC
4 upvotes, 0 direct replies
If there's even ONE small things in front of the target object, the item is completely invisible to my spouse. He never considers moving things to look behind them.
Comment by Technical-Banana574 at 08/03/2025 at 21:32 UTC
14 upvotes, 4 direct replies
This drives me insane, but I think I have an idea of why it happens too. My husband will often have me come look for something right in front of his darn eyes that I can find instantly. On the same token, he will point out something to me on the highway that I wont be able to pick up as quickly or will outright miss because we are moving.
I could be wrong, but maybe this is kind of a remnant of hunter gatherer. Like men were hunters so they needed to be able to track movement quickly and women tended to be gatherers so we saw more stationary stuff and had to pick out things closer and see in more range of colors.
Comment by iOawe at 08/03/2025 at 19:43 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I’ve always wondered this myself
Comment by EmmytheBarbarian at 08/03/2025 at 20:20 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
This exact thing happened to me. My husband was asking me where his shirts were. I walked past him and saw he had found some shorts.... from the exactly same laundry basket where his clean shirts are! Like... what? (I'm terrible about folding laundry, don't judge me).
Comment by chickenox at 08/03/2025 at 21:27 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
refrigerator blindness is a real epidemic among the dads and dudes of the world
Comment by DataCassette at 08/03/2025 at 21:30 UTC
3 upvotes, 1 direct replies
My wife will say "did you use your special eyes?"
Comment by domesticatedprimate at 08/03/2025 at 22:52 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
The old theory, now probably debunked, is that men evolved to hunt while women evolved to gather. As such, supposedly men focus their vision on a pinpoint and ignore the big picture in order to track the prey better. Women on the other hand supposedly see the big picture so as to better find the berries or grubs or whatever.
So according to the theory, men have to focus directly on the object in order to see it. If the overall field of vision is filled with a bunch of different objects, some stand out as more important than others and command the guy's attention, "hiding" what they're looking for even though it's right there.
While I believe this explanation is wrong, it does describe how it feels when I (frequently) can't specific find things on my messy desk.
Comment by maple-sugarmaker at 09/03/2025 at 00:36 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Something not in its place ceases to exist.
Be it a pint of milk, keys, a wrench, or whatever. It lives somewhere and needs to be put back after use.
I'm a man, SAHD, and farmer. I cook, I take care of everyone's logistics, and fix all the broken shit.
Be it a chef's knife, my wife's undies, or a 24mm socket, it has a place to be
Comment by PoisonedIvysaur at 09/03/2025 at 01:12 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
That's object permanence it sucks. This is the same reason why I put my wallet keys inhaler and headphones in the same spot. So i never lose them. Otherwise, I will definitely lose them.
Comment by FayeQueen at 09/03/2025 at 02:35 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Hell, my husband won't even use his eyes. He'll literally just stares dead ahead. Won't look around and declare the item a lost cause. Like condiments are in the door, he won't look at the door, just stares like how a cow looks at an oncoming train at the top shelf.
Comment by burnsea88 at 08/03/2025 at 19:40 UTC
5 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I can say from experience, this is not just a man problem. It is a human problem.
Comment by ian2121 at 08/03/2025 at 20:26 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I suffer from this so bad. If you find out why let me know. I’d like to fix it. It is so frustrating to look all over for something for 10 minutes then ask my wife and she just knows.
Comment by SubjectArt697 at 08/03/2025 at 20:33 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I'm a woman and struggle with that, my brother tells me where they are lol
Comment by rancidvat at 08/03/2025 at 20:38 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I have major adhd. Finding things is difficult.
Comment by ghast123 at 08/03/2025 at 22:00 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
This is my boyfriend. I'm the gatherer/finder in the relationship and I told him every time I find something for him, I'm gonna make him put a dollar into a jar and then we can use that money for a vacation lol
Comment by shaard at 08/03/2025 at 23:48 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
One of my dad's favourite things to do was tell us that we were barely aware of anything outside 1" away from our bodies (usually stated after we were unable to find something). It's been great fun getting back at him for the same thing lately! :D
Comment by CharacterBack1542 at 09/03/2025 at 08:57 UTC
2 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I do this all the time
My wife says I'm "looking with my Man Eyes"
Comment by hilhilbean at 09/03/2025 at 17:23 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I ask my boyfriend, "Are you using your boy eyes or your girl eyes?"
Nine times out of ten, I will find what he is looking for immediately.
Comment by cookieaddictions at 08/03/2025 at 21:38 UTC
2 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I see videos of men saying the ketchup isn't there when it's right in front of their eyes and I end up angry at some dude I don't even know. If this is what cohabitating with a male is, I don't want it!!
Comment by Frozenlime at 08/03/2025 at 20:16 UTC
3 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Men's vision is based on movement. If the object is still it will be invisible to men.
Comment by Universeintheflesh at 08/03/2025 at 19:37 UTC
3 upvotes, 1 direct replies
I remember reading once that men are better at finding things that are moving and woman when things are still. Like a hunter vs gatherer thing.
Comment by Beezyo at 08/03/2025 at 19:50 UTC
1 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Wait! So it's not just me and my dad that do this!?