https://www.reddit.com/r/AskOldPeople/comments/1iy0hv6/staying_in_touch_with_siblings/
created by Naive_Car2524 on 25/02/2025 at 17:27 UTC
8 upvotes, 45 top-level comments (showing 25)
If you have a sibling who lives very far away (several hours on a plane), how often do you see them? Does one of you always do the traveling, or do you take the time to visit each other?
Comment by AutoModerator at 25/02/2025 at 17:27 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
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Comment by mrslII at 25/02/2025 at 18:04 UTC
14 upvotes, 2 direct replies
Estranged.
Comment by kindcrow at 25/02/2025 at 18:48 UTC
5 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I have one who lives fifteen minutes away and I see him exactly NEVER times a year.
Comment by hugeuvula at 25/02/2025 at 18:06 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Occasional texts.
Comment by Mauerparkimmer at 25/02/2025 at 18:08 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I try to see my little sister every few months. I take the train to her as she has so many responsibilities. I also have an elder, adopted “sister” who is a malignant narcissist. I have been extremely happily no contact with her for over ten years. I will never speak to her again. In fact, she is extremely lucky that I keep my distance from her.
Comment by Silly-Resist8306 at 25/02/2025 at 18:49 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
My brother lives 1400 miles away. I visit with him in person about once a year. His wife cannot travel and he can’t really leave her alone. We do talk on the phone once a week. Better, my 3 kids keep him in the family loop with texts and pics of their kids. Despite not seeing g each other, we are close. As I’ve learned, proximity is not necessary.
Comment by DustOne7437 at 25/02/2025 at 18:50 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Right now they keep visiting us, because we’re broke. I miss going to Denver.
Comment by Tetsubin at 25/02/2025 at 18:59 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I have two sisters: one in San Francisco and one in Connecticut. I used to visit the one in Conn, but her husband and I don't get along. She's coming here for my birthday this year. I fly out to San Francisco on business at least once a year (usually right around the time of my sister's birthday), and I take a few extra days and book a B&B so I can spend time with her. She's going to visit me and my sister on the East Coast in spring.
In between visits, we stay in touch via Whatsapp and by having a monthly one hour zoom meeting on Sunday nights.
Comment by Boater280ws at 25/02/2025 at 17:35 UTC
2 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Unfortunately, both of my siblings have passed. Honestly, we were never that close so each of us lived our separate lives. We lived 3 to 4 hour drives from each other.
Comment by PicoRascar at 25/02/2025 at 20:05 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I prefer them all at arm's length and that's where I keep them. If we cross paths, it's just a coincidence.
Comment by HarlandKing at 25/02/2025 at 17:34 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Take turns every few months.
Comment by Gladyskravitz99 at 25/02/2025 at 17:57 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
We video chat a couple times a week and text throughout most days. And we visit each other a few times a year (we've mostly taken turns or met in the middle).
And I live about ten to twelve hours by car from my siblings, who live about three hours from each other.
Comment by Mysterious_Tax_5613 at 25/02/2025 at 18:29 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
My story is nothing like yours. I can tell you my story but it won't much matter to you because you have your own family.
Comment by revtim at 25/02/2025 at 18:32 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
My sister and I call each other on our birthdays and see each other once a year at Christmas at our Mom's place.
Comment by remberzz at 25/02/2025 at 19:12 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Siblings both live 1000+ miles away. Travel is expensive and there are family and/or work obligations on all sides that make getting away difficult.
We text once in a while; phone calls are rare.
The times I see them are, unfortunately, usually based on emergencies of one sort or another.
Last year there were several months where one sibling and I were dealing with an urgent situation with my mom, and we were kind of taking turns. (Third sibling too sick to help.) The overlaps where I got to spend time with my sibling were so nice, despite the situation.
I dearly wish I could see more of them and spend time together. We all have health issues - one of us has been near death multiple times in the past year and is, in fact, fighting another fight right now - so it's just a matter of time until someone dies.
Which is terribly upsetting and depressing to think about. Even though they're far away and we rarely communicate, my world would definitely feel empty without them.
Comment by Old-Bug-2197 at 25/02/2025 at 19:13 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Older brother was traumatized in the state where I live. So, I go every year with my husband and we visit a few times over a week. We see other family members, too.
Comment by Emptyplates at 25/02/2025 at 19:14 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Almost never. Every couple of years. None of us live close to each other and I'm no contact with two of them.
Comment by Jakeandellwood at 25/02/2025 at 19:17 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I live in Sweden for 20 years now. I talk to my brother in north carolina every Sunday. I used to talk to my sister every week also but she passed away at 52 last june. As for in person meetings it is when ever i have time and money to travel back to the usa, nobody other than my mother has ever bother to come visit me here.
Comment by mutant6399 at 25/02/2025 at 19:17 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I text with my stepsiblings now and then, and visit them every couple years. They came out here once (don't travel much).
My sibling lives 45 minutes away; I see them once or twice a year on average. We're not close, but get along ok.
Comment by cbawiththismalarky at 25/02/2025 at 19:26 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
My brother lives in California, I live in the uk, before covid I went every two years, I've not been since 2019, I mentioned to him recently at the current rate we're probably only going to meet up 4 more times
Comment by Familiar_Raise234 at 25/02/2025 at 19:26 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
One died, one estranged, one 10-12 hour drive away. Never see each other.
Comment by cheap_dates at 25/02/2025 at 19:28 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I have one sister who I haven't seen in over 20 years because of some stunts she pulled when our mother was dying. We are "Christmas Card" relatives.
Comment by DD-de-AA at 25/02/2025 at 19:36 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
see them for about a week once a year. I always go there.
Comment by Stunning_Rock951 at 25/02/2025 at 19:37 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
estranged
Comment by mand71 at 25/02/2025 at 19:59 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I've lived nearly 1000km from my two brothers for over twenty years. I saw the older one (who is a year younger than me) a few times with his wife and kids. He started not talking to me after I told our mum that him and his wife were divorced (I found out about six months after the divorce, lol). Haven't been in touch with him since our mum died in 2022.
My youngest brother I didn't really know, as I left home when he was four years old. Of course, I'd spoken to him throughout the years, but it was only last year that I stayed with him and his family that I got to know him better (and I must say, it was weird...).