https://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/comments/ft3sg1/aita_for_hiding_my_past_relationships/
created by tudorwife on 01/04/2020 at 17:08 UTC
51 upvotes, 7 top-level comments (showing 7)
I don’t know how to start this … so, I got married to my husband pretty quickly after I first met him, and there’s a pretty big age gap between us. (It’s big enough that I’m not going to tell you our ages lol) He’s been married before, and he really loves that I’m more fun than his previous wives – I don’t want to change him or get involved with his political/religious business, I just accept what he is.
Here’s the problem. He just found out about some stuff from my past and he’s super mad about it. Everyone says that I shouldn’t have gotten with him because of it, and that I should have at least made a serious effort to make sure that he never found out because it makes me look really bad. I feel like things that happened when I was a teenager shouldn’t be a problem now (even though they do make me look really bad) and like I couldn’t do much more to keep it quiet, but all his friends disagree. AITA?
Comment by mary-anns-hammocks at 01/04/2020 at 18:02 UTC
13 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Ehh... Need some INFO. You're being really vague. What did you do as a teenager? Hooking up with people? If it was before you met him, as long as you didn't lie to him and it just never came up, you're not the asshole. If you lied to him (you talk about a giant age gap... Are you *still* a teenager? How far in the past is this?) or cheated on him, you're probably the asshole.
Comment by Kbye80 at 02/04/2020 at 01:53 UTC
10 upvotes, 0 direct replies
ESH I think we can all agree you’re the 10 among his previous wives (all 3s) and you’ve always made the boys go wild. The men who took advantage of you are definitely AHs, but fidelity is expected from a royal wife and you can’t say you didn’t know your hubby is violently jealous
Comment by flamingoinghome at 01/04/2020 at 19:59 UTC
6 upvotes, 0 direct replies
INFO for sure. What exactly are your ages? And...how long ago were you "a teenager" anyway (Im guessing you're not one now--that would be creepy!)? And what, exactly, did you do?
Comment by TheHondoGod at 01/04/2020 at 19:58 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
NAH: its just people over reacting, but that kind of stuff happens in relationships. Yes you should have told him. You need to be honest with your partner. On the other hand, he shouldn't be flipping his lid about something that happened when you were a teenager of all things!
Try and work it out, but sometimes people aren't meant to be. if worse comes to worse you can just axe this relationship and push for a divorce.
Comment by Wumpus2003 at 01/04/2020 at 23:57 UTC
2 upvotes, 1 direct replies
ESH
!Henry!< your husband is a bit of an asshole where relationships are concerned. I strongly suspect that if you don't want to be a head shorter than you are, then finding a boat to Europe immediately is your best course of action. >!Oops, too late, Anne!<
Comment by jpallan at 03/04/2020 at 07:50 UTC
2 upvotes, 0 direct replies
I do want to say that from a reasonable point of view, you are NTA, because the two guys who molested you earlier were fucking pedophiles, for fuck's sake.
Then again, you wed a dude who was old enough to be your grandfather so really, I think you should reconsider what kind of D you catch.
Comment by AutoModerator at 01/04/2020 at 17:08 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
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